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Sexist Beatdown: The LOST Women of LOST Edition - Washington City Paper

a. The plane crash unhinged Jack from space-time, forcing him to relive the same moment in his life over and over again. In that moment, Jack attempts to fix something in the dumbest way possible, and fails unspectacularly at it; b. Jack is an agent ...

How Marion Barry Rolls: Loose Lips Daily - Washington City Paper

AFTER THE JUMP--- Fenty details FY10 overspending plan, will tap special-purpose funds to cover general-fund shortfall; ex-emergence-management chief criticizes Fenty snow response; Hizzoner lays tennis beatdown on schoolkids; Metro having a hard ...

Catholic Child Neglect: DC Archdiocese Cuts Adoption Rather Than Abide ... - Religion Dispatches

As DC law changes to require equality for same sex couples seeking to adopt, the Catholic Church (which has been in the adoption business for generations) opts to close up shop rather than to abide by the law and treat gay and lesbian families ...

February 19 - Author Elizabeth Sommer - WGNtv.com

But it takes years, even decades of that diet abuse to produce those problems, while the link ... other unprocessed foods), or roughly 100 pounds of sugar every year for every man, woman, and child. Put another way - if all you gave up diet-wise was ...

There's No Such Thing as a Free Market -- Just a Matter of Who Pays ... - AlterNet

Raj Patel opens his new book, The Value of Nothing: How to Reshape Market Society and Redefine Democracy , with Oscar Wilde’s observation that “nowadays people know the price of everything and the value of nothing.” Patel shows how our faith in ...

US compensates Afghans for death, damage from war - Atlantic City Press

The fallout of war has a price in southern Afghanistan. U.S. Army units fighting the Taliban in Helmand province have a compensation system for any death, injury or damage to crops and buildings caused by American forces to Afghan civilians and their ...

Gareth Thomas: 'I can handle a few wolf whistles from the crowd – it ... - The Independent

Gareth "Alfie" Thomas phoned his Cardiff Blues team-mate and great pal Andy "Powelly" Powell on Monday, to commiserate with him over the drunken shenanigans that got Powell booted out of the Welsh rugby union squad, but also to offer some sage advice ...

3-MINUTE MOVIE GUIDE: Film capsules - The Daily News Online

Martin Scorsese clearly had a ball making this one, which seemingly hurls everything the director knows about filmmaking up on screen in a blazing, masterful technical triumph. But even with Leonardo DiCaprio leading the superb cast, this crime-and ...

Teachers group pushes back against proposed dyslexia testing mandate - madison

Will Morton, 8, of Verona, reads to his mother, Chris, in their home in Verona. MICHELLE STOCKER -- The Capital Times Will Morton was a happy, creative and enthusiastic child until he went to kindergarten. As his classmates sounded out letters, and ...

Defying the odds, Kardashians' pop culture empire keeps growing - CharlotteObserver.com

LOS ANGELES When a reality show about the Kardashian sisters of Southern California debuted in the fall of 2007, most people had never heard of the family and what was known could scarcely be considered positive. Their late father, an attorney ...

Open Question: How do feminists feel now their poster child has been arrested - again?

this time for attempted murder & arson? ~~~ Police charged her with attempted first-degree murder, five counts of arson, assault and battery, communicating threats, three counts of misdemeanor child abuse, injury to personal property, identity theft and resisting a public officer. When officers arrived, they found Mangum and her boyfriend, Milton Walker, 33, fighting. According to police documents, Mangum scratched, punched and threw objects at Walker and told him, "I'm going to stab you, (expletive)!" ~~~ This is the woman that feminist groups across America stood behind. This is the woman who did what feminist groups world wide pretend does not happen. This is the woman who cost other people their jobs - but she went practically unpunished. Will they condemn her - now? Or is the fact that her intended target was male justify her crimes, like Mary Winkler & others have been defended by feminist groups? http://www.wral.com/news/local/story/7068705/Elf - thanks for not answering the question... I 'got that from' the way feminist groups went beserk demanding justice for her when she lied about the rape. They oddly went silent once her lies were proven to be lies. more

Open Question: Understanding the evils that humans do ?

The evil side of humans from - murder - rape - child molestation - abuse - beatings - stealing - killing - bullying - fighting - hating - war - torturing eachother - evilness of all kinds. Why do humans do these things the true true answer is a very simple answer in fact its too simple. The answer is this - Humans have only been out of the jungle for 10 thousand years. It makes sense when you deeply think about it - Humans have only been out of the jungle for 10 thousand years see my point ???? PS. Only 10 thousand years ago we were in the jungle and very savage our evolution was savage. more

Open Question: serious medical help needed?

Help me please, I'm writing concerning my 27 year old daughter, I don't even know where to start, from a very young child she was the most beautiful caring timid little angel you would ever meet , then at age 7 and 8 she was sexually molested by a so called member of our neighbors family , over a 2 year period , this didn't come out to us until she was 11 years old and heard a friend of hers saying it had happened to her, so then she knew she wasn't the only one this horrific thing had happened to just her . a parents worst night mare had happened considering we never let the kids stray always knew where they were and this man would abuse her when their was always people around as in family barbecue and get together, we took all the proper procedures at the time with police counseling etc, not long after this my eldest daughter went into a bad seen with drugs and alcohol due to my brothers suicide, by the way we have had 5 in our family suicide. over the years my daughter I'm now writing about left school got an apprenticeship in hairdressing , was always active but always very sad, she got into very abusive relationships with men as sometimes is a pattern following sexual abuse, also developed anorexia as the father of her only child, did, the control , sexual mental and physical abuse, sometimes locking her in the bathroom for hours and hours not letting her get to her son, at this time she tried to get avos out on him , but his control and scare tactics were to much for her, so i left my job in Newcastle and moved to country N.S.W., in hope that she could escape and also i had care of my eldest granddaughter, as her mum was getting her life together . ok sorry this is so long, since that she did leave this relationship had custody of her son , then had what we thought and of course expected was a nervous breakdown , but she was diagnosed with bi-polar. her weight wasn't yet down to the way it has since then , it was in the beginning stages , she had hidden the vomiting and laxatives from us but she was in major mania, was scheduled in Tamworth bass hospital for three months , that was 5 years ago, when she came home she was on lithium , and it made her worse it kept her at a level of deep clinical depression shes been on every anti depressant since then nothing seems to work , the next major event was when finally she meet a guy we thought would treat her well she moved to Tasmania , was there 4 about 3 months , she found her fiance was cheating on her so she and her son left and flew back here she weighed in at 42 kg, i knew then we were in trouble, things were getting much worse . then she was schedule into Banksia hospital tube feed etc , but they were so negative , not being an eating disorder clinic , and being the fact that she has multiple mental not just one, it was almost like she was being punished for the illnesses she had , she escaped while in there feeling like a criminal and just wanting to die, we went through 4 days of sheer terror , she pulled the tube out and they kept threatening to tie her up and keep putting in , its like no one has any compassion, ok back to the escape it was middle of winter shes skin and bones no shoes , a drunk guy came past a tree she was taking shelter in and forced her back to his place , there he repeatedly raped her, until she finally escaped with the help of a so called friend of this animal , and he returned her to the hospital , the police were bought in again, she spent nearly 5 months in there just feeding her up giving her meds that didn't work , she was just crying and so sad all the time , it absolutely rips your heart out. ok she was released again. that was 18 months ago, now after another rape and torture by another guy again police involved we got her into Westmead eating disorder clinic nearly down to organ failure one doctor told her shes just f....ed in the head , another doctor up here in the northern tablelands said to her after i had to rush her to the emergency center at this small local hospital just looked at her and said oh you will be dead by the time your 40 , I'm terrified place and I've looked after many in my family before , and being a service of suicide , this is one of the cruelest things I've ever seen , shes begging for ect , as her body just doesn't respond to medication, its like unless u have private coverage no one wants to listen or help I've fought with Dr and the system so long I just wish as any parent would we could just take it on I mean the illness and free them , but what I'm so angry about is the treating of patients like they are just clones of each other , no two are alike no two respond to meds our life experiences are different our chemical makeup is not the same , I was told at one hospital that they wouldn't take her anymore as they cant help her , I sat in front of a panel of at least 10 medical so called professionals and I said you mean to tell me , bi-pola , major anxiety and panic attack syndrome , more

Open Question: I think she'll tear us apart?

Okay. Basically my boyfriend and I have been having a few problems lately, and last week we almost broke up. We are now working through things and it's looking okay. There is a problem: his mother. He is 25 and yet she smothers him as if he was a child. She also has bipolar disorder, a quite severe case, and is known to snap; she is critical of both of us and has shouted at me, unprovoked, a number of times. When we nearly broke up last week, she posted abuse to and about me on facebook (which is pathetic of her I know but it was pretty nasty stuff, basically that I'm stupid and crazy etc without going into too much detail) and twisted the situation entirely to make it look like I am cruel towards my boyfriend, when in reality we have both made mistakes and hurt each other and as previously mentioned are now trying to work through them. I know this is what he would have said to her as well so it can't be coming from him. She is still posting abuse about me here there and everywhere and I know she is probably trying to talk him out of staying with me. She is very controlling and he is quite impressionable and I worry that she is trying, and will eventually succeed, to split us up. I can't understand why she suddenly hates me and not only am I hurt by it - I've been there for her quite a lot when her bipolar's been bad - I am also angry and really afraid that it will damage our relationship. I am angry because I feel as though it has nothing to do with her and I feel as though she is trying to control our relationship, and my boyfriend. She also seems to know what is going on in our sex life and this really freaks me out O_o Sorry if the above sounded quite confusing. I do want to stay with my boyfriend but I am beginning to think she is the biggest problem in our relationship, but considering our recent problems and the fact that he is very close to his mum how would I go about raising this? I really think she's going to come between us. I was reduced to tears by something she posted earlier and I really don't feel like our relationship, or indeed myself, needs this? Any advice welcome and appreciated. more

Open Question: I'm watching TLC's show "I'm Pregnant and..." How can ANYONE be so selfish as to breed when they are so ill?

Seriously... The chick on here now is SEVERELY Bi-Polar... To have a child, she must go off of all of her medication, meaning, she will be a FREAKING NUT-JOB for the length of the pregnancy... She already has 2 kids so the very fact that she is pregnant and off her meds means that she is SEVERELY ABUSING the children she already has... Her medication doesn't work very well even when she is on it so that means that on medication or off, SHE IS ABUSING HER CHILDREN! Her children will not only be handicapped by the genetic grab-bag of party favors because her mother is insane and her father is so disturbed that he would marry and breed with a woman that is that insane but the mental and emotional abuse of being raised by a mother that is never in her right mind pretty much guarantees that her children will repeat the cycle of chaos with their own lives when they are grown since they will be no where NEAR "Well Adjusted". How can ANYONE, especially a woman with maternal instincts, be so damn selfish as to put her own desire above the very well-being of her offspring? She claims to want to have children to love and raise to be good people when they are grown yet her innate mental illness almost guarantees that her children will be severely jacked up as adults... It is a Catch 22, I know... But still, shouldn't the well-being of the children take precedence over the woman with the bad genes and severe mental illness's desire for a kid? Or is she like the millions of addiction riddled, mentally ill people that are too insane to understand that their very presence in their child's life is abuse in and of itself? p.s. I'm not going to have kids specifically because I know that I will pass on the genetic predisposition for a congenital hip condition and because of the predisposition for addiction that runs all through my mother's side of the family. I'm not so selfish as to knowingly give birth to a child that will suffer with either pain or addiction as an adult... I'm living the question I'm asking. more

Open Question: Cops said they found nothing in an abusive home. What do we do?

Well basically long story short, my husband has 2 children from a previous marriage, they live with the mother in another state and the mother, as a form of punishment, will slap the children across the faces. To me this is abuse and this should not be tolerated, and he knows she does it because he's seen her do it before. Well last night after talking to his daughter she confessed that her "mommy" has been hitting her and that her mommys boyfriend gets really mad at her, but she wouldn't say what he does when he gets mad. Also she was abused at the mother's mom's home by her cousin and they were suppose to be in counseling, but the mother has neglected to take her. The mother and her boyfriend do drugs in the home right in front of the children. So last night my husband called the child abuse line and asked them what to do, they told him to call the police for a child wellness check on the house. The cops went there, they looked at the kids faces didnt see any marks, the mother was "cooperative" so they decided that my husband is lying. They called him back and asked him if he is making stuff up to try and take custody. He said no hes not making anything up, and I know for a fact that police should not handle it that way because my father is a police officer. Anyway, we don't really have money for a lawyer, but those children need to get out of that home. He is calling the DCFS to see about the mother getting in trouble for neglect, but what else can be done? I can't really think of anything to do! Please help!I put this in Marriage and Divorce hoping to get some good answers! Thank you! more

Open Question: For those who do not agree with the Iraq war?

I would say that regime change was the reason the cabinet invaded Iraq. I would say that the WMD or the ability to attack in 45 mins was fabricated. It is undeniable that the chemical weapons munitions were stock piled. Perhaps even this glaringly obvious piece of information is not accepted by you. Perhaps you believe that the Weapons inspectors imagined the miriad of chemical weapons munitions sites filled with anthrax, botulism, dirty bomb ingredients etc etc. Maybe these chemicals were flown in my the US without the knowledge of the UN. Maybe saddam and Bush were having cocktails and it was all a hoax- get real. The point is Tony Blair deceived the cabinet saying that Iraq could launch WMD attacks in 45 mins to facilitate regime change. This was deception but entirely acceptable given that one of the worlds worst tyrants would be overthrown. Are you saying that Saddam should not be removed? Are you saying that the WMD ingredients did not exist? Are you denying that saddam was the worst perpetrator of human rights abuses of his time? Do you deny that Saddam has been trying to build a supergun for years? It is a fact that the USA met with Saddam and his government. This is what international politicians do. International politicians and governments meet and agree on trade deals, arms deals every day. Are you saying that no-one should have tried to collude with Iraq? Are you saying that Iraq should have been ignored and no trade deals should have been struck up? Should no-one have tried to unlock the multi trillion dollar a year economy that Iraq has to offer? The fact remains that Iraq has much to offer. It could not offer much when smothered by a despot leader hell bent on torturing and starving his own people. Iran is going the same way. Iranians want modernisation yet ahmedinijad is listening to the elders who want to fight EVERYONE. Are you saying that Iran should be allowed to manufacture Nuclear weapons when they have made it clear that their sole mission is the destruction of Isreal? Perhaps we should sit on the fence for years as we did with Iraq and apply sanctions.# Sanctions that Iraq ignored. Go to bbc website and read about Iraqi sanctions and what they mean. The UN applied sanctions, Iraq ignored them and continue to sell baby milk and starve children yet when the USA threatened with with military action, all of a sudden the liberal left sit up and protest? Where were you when Clinton bombed Iraq in 1998? The UN showed they were merely a talking shop. Saddam laughed in the face of of the UN for 13 years before they finally threatened military action. It was only when this was threatened he acted/ FACT. If it was up to you saddam would still be torturing, killing, stealing from the world. The casualties in iraq stem from Muslims killing muslims after centuries of tribal hatred, Not US aggression. Please take the time to answer the questions above in a logical fashion more

Open Question: My mom aunt usually asks my mom money for her son who plays gambling so often that he must go to another city?

my mom aunt usually asks my mom money for her son who plays gambling so often that he must go to another city to escape from paying back huge money to many people that he borrow from. to day, her aunt come to my house to borrow my ATM card to send money to that son to eat in 3 days and give me the same money to me by cash because her card left no money and that day is our national holiday so all the banks weren't worked. i can't give her my ATM card because it's make me feel uncomfortable because if she takes it with her, she can withdraws any money she want that are more than the little cash she give me now and she will never return it to me. i'm sure about that because her son who first time flies from his creditors, to live a life of just plays gambling, have no knowledge to do any job, can be starved in a strange city. in addition to that, my mom aunt job is breeding fish and selling them to the aquatic products companies. however, she usually loses her capital in that job since the beginning but she never gives it up. my mom usually give her family food and money to buy to eat. therefore, i don't agree to give her my ATM, i decide to take her little cash and transfer the same amount of money to her son. the problem happens when my mom who trusts her aunt although she withdrew my mom money many times, hurl a stream of abuse at me that i am artful, dishonest and cruel to not give her aunt my ATM card to keep my account secret although in fact, i don't have enough money event just to eat the cheapest food for a month in that account. why my mom want to know my everything? I'm over 18 years old now, why don't I have the right to keep mine? she says that she will sell all of her properties and give them to the charity organizations, she won't give my brother and me anything. in fact, i think i'm a very good child. i answered her i don't need anything from her although I'm too poor, homeless, starve and don't earn any money now. what should i do now? although my mom tell me that, i'm sure that she never says that to my brother because she love him more than herself. why she hates me like that although i do everything that a good daughter always contribute to her family? more

Open Question: My 11 year old step-son is claiming that his mother abuses him physically and mentally. What to do?

His Father (my husband) and I have seen evidence of bruising and scratches however at the time we ask him what happened, he claims that it happened during one of his activities (soccer, football, gym, etc...). Later on he will start to cry and tell us that his mom caused the marks on him because she was angry. She even went so far as to smack him in the face hard enough to leave a bruise but we didn't find out that she had caused the bruise until well after the fact. My husband and I are unsure of what to do because the child is scared to talk to anyone for fear that he won't be believed (a belief that is reinforced by his guardian questioning him if his Father is the cause of his problems with his Mother). My husband doesn't want to put his son in a more difficult position because of trying to correct this problem, as the county that this would be heard in does not have a good track record of following through with problems like this, but we we know something has to be done, we just don't know what. My husband is also concerned because the judge and guardian handling our son's previous custody agreements are very much for the Mother and of course she has and will continue to deny the accusations should she become aware of them. If anyone could give us some advice as to the best way to handle this and hopefully get our son out of this situation with minimal conflict for him, I would really appreciate it as we are at a complete loss of what to do. We're darned if we do, darned if we don't. I don't know if it matters but we're in VA.He has a Guardian-ad-litem appointed to him, however the problem is that his Mother can be very convincing to someone who doesn't know her well. Even after almost 8 years of dealing with her, I can know that she's lying to me but she's so convincing she can make me doubt myself. I can't even imagine how that feels for my step-son when he tries to explain his situation. He constantly says that nobody believes that his mom would behave how he describes: mood swings, violent behavior, manipulative, etc... Child Services did investigate his mother when he was 5, but nothing came of it. My husband has discussed the situation with her and she has admitted to hitting their son but she also says that unless she leaves a mark on him there's nothing we can do about it. Obviously she has left marks but we only find out they were caused by her after the marks have faded. It's a horrible situation for anybody but especially a child and it is awful to feel like you have no way to help him.It is Joint Legal and Physical Custody.My step-son lives with his Mother 50% of the time and with us the other 50%. The guardian is referring to a Guardian-ad-litem which is basically someone who is supposed to represent what the child wants and or/needs. more

Resolved Question: No win no fee........but there not doing anything I am!?

8 months ago I was approached by a law firm, asking if I had ever got any from of compensation for the abuse I suffered as a child? As it turns out this was a mistake on there part, having been looking for students of the same school name but different county. As it happens I did but amount I got was not a lot. The lawyers offered to look into my case; I agreed to let them, as I could do with the money. They emailed me every week some times twice week, asking for information, regarding details of the case. When who how sort of thing. As soon as it was clarify this was not a straightforward case, there interest level dropped from 100% to 5%. And for every 5 emails I send them asking for advise, questions, or to pass on my wishes, I get one very short email back, mostly saying, that as yet I am not a client, and they are still investigating. In 6 months all they had done is send to letters. 8 months into things, it is I who half way across the world, found the old owner of the school, and found there lawyers. When and if it comes to paying there fee, am I able to negotiate their fee. As I am not willing to pay 8+ months of legal fees, when only 3 weeks of work was done. And the fact that I had to do all the investigative work myself, when they clam to be experts in difficult cases ( And I don’t even live in the uk), and investigative law. I don’t think its fair that I have to give up a chuck of my award, for work they never did, as I was not there “client”.Not only that but the failed to keep me up to date, or answer my questions, witch is why i am having to ask here. E.g my early a postWell the lawyers in question have a good rep, witch is why I cant understand why they are acting the way they are. They are always in the uk press, and have had some very high profile cases in resent times . Could they charge me that much , even if I have it in writing many times, that I am NOT there client , and THEY HAVE NOT taken my case, and are still investigating if there is a claim?They also never explained to me what their fees or payment options where, I had to ask and even then they did not explain it very well. On there web site is says, if a claim is made they get there fee from the insurants company, if a claim can not be made then I am liable for there fee's. 1st How is that no win no fee 2nd They never told me that. I guess, as I am not there client. But we have no made contact with the schools lawyers and the insurants company, so when do I become a client, surely they have to tell meWell to date, they have written 2 letters and are ment to be sending a 3rd. Problem is changing lawyers after 8 months and going to new once, and exsplian the hole thing again... would set me back...time wise. And as I am not in the Uk (Australia) I don’t know whom I could go to.I live in Australia . I could have got my family lawyers here to deal with it , but as they charge by the hour , and are not (British lawyers ) or child abuse law experts. I thought this would save time and double handling of the matter, by simply this lawyers. As they came to me. I never went to them .I think it is a CFA. But they have not said , as much in an email to me.They hinted that it may be an option , but thats just it hinted, they have put nothing in writing to me.I did read it, and there is know need to explain things simply. Or main mode of communication has been email, and as I live in Australia, most days this is the only mode of communication. What I ment is, they have not indicated in any shape or form that I am a client. Of course a contract would have to be sighed. But one would thing; they would let me know before hand via email that they are taking on the case. And one would think all there term would be outlined in that contract. But up to now, nothing with these lawyers has been direct. And I simply wont cover my self. As I cannot afford to pay there fee’s if a claim cannot be made. As the lawyer himself says one thing, and his legal aid, says something different. So just wonted to clarifyAnd I am sorry about my spelling, I am dyslexic ! more

Resolved Question: Are you aware of the fact that child abuse and neglect IS everyone's business?

If you are on Y!A asking what to do if a kid cracked their head hard... you have a problem.. just sayin' more

Open Question: The Social construction of what? by Ian Hacking Chapter 8!?

These questions are in relation to the issues Hacking discusses in CHAPTER 8 only! not the whole book! 1. What phenomena are the focus of Hacking’s attention? Why might someone suspect these phenomena are “socially constructed”? For example, in Chapter 8 Hacking discusses the demise of Captain James Cook, the European explorer of the South Seas. Cook’s death is not in dispute (nor would any of us argue that the death itself – the lifeless, moldering body – was socially constructed). So what is being constructed or deconstructed around the “brute fact of Cook’s death”? You should be able to summarize the essence of your chapter for your classmates who have focused their attention elsewhere. 2. What is at stake in accepting or rejecting the claim that the phenomena are socially constructed? For example, in Chapter 5 Hacking reviews the various claims about the construction of “child abuse.” What are the consequences – for our understanding, for social policy, for other related phenomena – if we accept the claim that child abuse is constructed? If we reject it? 3. How does Hacking come down on the issue an how does he support his conclusion(s)? You might review the “sticking points” he discusses in Chapter 3 as a way of thinking through his account. You also might think about a continuum of constructionism (running from weak to strong) and try to locate Hacking’s conclusion along it. 4. How do you come down on the issue and how do you support your conclusion(s)? You should probably employ the same strategy you used to deal with (3) above. Don’t feel obligated to agree with Hacking – sometimes you may of course, but try to wiggle free of his influence so you can make up your own mind. I greatly appreciate everyone's participation to these questions, as I would like to see what people think of this chapter! THANKS! more

Open Question: Can you go over my essay?

I'm not very good at essays and I need someone to let me know if this Narrative essay is ok?Thanks Children are so innocent Reading Martin Luther King Jr. “Letter from Birmingham Jail” made me think about what I would go to jail for and it made me sad to realize that I do not believe in something so passionate enough to go to jail for. Then, after really thinking it through I realized that the one thing I would definitely go to jail for is my family and their safety. As a mom that is one of my biggest and most important priorities in my life. It can be from child abuse, their health and even children’s education that I would fight for. I strongly believe that if they were in any situation where their environment was unsafe and the only way to prove my point would be to go to jail, then I would definitely go. There are many forms of child abuse that go on in America: Physical; hitting, shaking, burns, human bites, strangulation.: Emotional; constant disapproval, belittling, constant teasing: Sexual: fondling, the showing of private parts by an adult, sexual intercourse, oral and anal sex, forcing a child to watch while others have sexual intercourse, incest, pornography: Neglect; absence of adequate food, shelter, emotional and physical security, and medical care. For these hideous and vicious acts I think my cause would make any mother ,parent or even any real human being go to jail for ,in my opinion. In fact, if I were to go to jail for this cause I do not think I would wait to get out to start doing something about it. The first step I would take would be to educate myself on the signs of abuse that a child might be dealing with. Most of the time it goes unnoticed because people think there are only physical signs of abuse but like I said there are many forms of it so one has to look closely. I would then ask for support from my family and friends to come together and help me fight to protect the children that have gone through this or try to help to prevent this from happening again or to any other child. There are numerous ways to help out this cause, volunteering, donating to certain organizations around the country and helping parents of abused children. These methods might seem demanding but if one thinks about what an unfortunate child has/had to go through it does not compare to what little we could do to help. We have to think about the good that will come out when we work together. What this cause says about me is that I truly care about the future and well being of any child, whether mine or someone else’s. It is not fair that someone would take the purity of a child and replace it with feelings of apprehension and fear towards another individual. The most obvious reason why I choose this cause is because I'm a mother and I want children to be safe, healthy, and happy. In doing this essay I have came across some sickening images and stories that make me wonder why this is happening to such innocent and beautiful children that are to be our future? It is very alarming to think that I have three children who are going to be around predators and not know how to stop them. In a perfect world this would all end in the future, but realistically it will never happen so I believe that it is our responsibility to help each other out and protect our children from any type of abuse. Even if it won’t stop today we can have a smaller amount of abuse going on in America if we commit to the cause. So as a compassionate human being that I am, my cause that I would go to jail for is any form of child abuse. Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. — Margaret Mead, anthropologist more

Resolved Question: I am worried about my brother...?

Sorry if this is long... My brother is 14 years old and sometimes he's ok, but sometimes he's not. When he was younger he never spoke at school as he was selectively mute, and a lot of the kids used to take advantage of him by framing him in order to get him into trouble as they knew he would not speak. As he's been getting older I have started to notice how angry and aggressive he gets easily with younger children and our younger siblings, sometimes hurting them. He also finds it difficult to focus on tasks e.g. tidying up and just wants to play around all day or use the computer. My parents are angry at him for being like this, but they are not helping him. In fact I feel as though they are making things worse by hitting him or shouting at him. I don't know why he behaves the way he does sometimes, it might be because he's had really bad times at school (he eventually went to school abroad for a few years before coming back here and he was seriously flogged in the school he went to abroad because he didn't speak for some time) or it might be because he has been abused by our parents, along with my siblings and I. I think he has picked up the anger from my dad as my dad has a tendency to become really angry and aggressive easily, even at the little things, and he has never cared about our feelings, he has always hurt us. I am really worried this this has affected my brother deeply. Please help. I don't know how to resolve this situation.I am worried that if I ignore the issues then things will get worse. more

Voting Question: Christianity.....................?

Okay - I am a person of learning, I love to learn, especially other cultures and religions, Im not sure why, but I do enjoy learning the way people think, and the way they live and why they live this way. Myself, I am Wiccan ( This word means CHILD OF NATURE. NOT WHORE OF SATAN, thank you VERY MUCH ) I spent a long time studying religions and I found this, and Buddhism was the one of felt closest to in beliefs and way of life, I am very happy in this religion, I do not wish to change, so do NOT try to force me or tell me otherwise. If you call me any names or try to tell me I will go to hell for this, I will report you and have you thrown off the site. Now, I have to admit I have always avoided Christianity since I was younger, after a brief spell at Sunday school, as I found its teachings unethical and sexist and a little hypo critic, but I decided to re educate myself with this religion as I do like to be intellectually and culturally aware of other people. Now, once again I have found this religion disturbing to say the the least, especially this chapter I found below: "Let your women keep silence in the churches;And when they heard that he spake in the Hebrew tongue to them, they kept the more silence; for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law. [The law, Genesis 3:16, says, And thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.] And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home [not the pastor or other men or women]: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church...The things that I write unto you are the commandments of the Lord." (1 Cor. 14:34-35, 37). If women are not meant to ''speak'' or have any ''say or power'' then why is Mary also worshipped and had such an important role in the coming of jesus? I mean its like God rang her up and said: ''Okay here it is love, im gonna impregnate you, against your will, your probably gonna lose your husband and oh yeah, your never aloud to speak or have an opinion, that alright yeah?? I thought so, good stuff.'' Without women - there would be no human race, there would be no Jesus Christ. How are these teachings right and ethical? I have to submit myself to my husband and im not to speak or have the same rights as my husband and I must be RULED by my husband, regardless of the fact that without my sex, there would be no MAN in the first place? Its despicable. They say that god is Neutral and Un sexist - this verse in the bible contradicts that COMPLETELY! How can you subject your wife, your SOUL mate to these teachings? Without your wife, you wont get a son! You are taking us women for granted and it is WRONG. And what is this that if I wish to LEARN ANYTHING I must ask only my husband? My husband is NOT all knowing ( I do not have a husband, this is hypothetical, although i am engaged ), my husband can not teach me everything!!! Not to mention that most men cant even TURN ON a washing machine, never mind bake bread!!! I would like this verse explained in the way YOU see it please, I would like to hear how YOU justify these teachings. I will remind you I am not here to take abuse, so give it and I will report you. Thank you.I apologise for my APPALLING spelling and punctuation! Unfortunatly as much as I love learning I do get tired and sloppy with my typing! =] more

Resolved Question: Thrice deported illegal alien declares: "United States Is Stupid"?

May 12, 11:59 AM Cochise County, AZ U.S. District Judge Henry Coke Morgan Jr. said: "The defendant has expressly stated that he has no respect for the United States and that once deported he will re-enter again and come back to Newport News where his history of alcohol abuse will further endanger the residents of this district." Judge Morgan sentenced Mota-Campos to 14 1/2 years in prison. While 43 year old Rolando Mota-Campos' personal reign of terror is apparently over at least for a few years, it is beyond sickening why this illegal alien with ties to the Mexican Mafia was able to disregard our border as well as the lives of innocent Americans for 19 years. He first entered this country illegally in 1988. TOPICS - Illegal immigration, illegal immigrants, United States, Rolando Mota-Campos , illegal alien, Mexican Mafia, border, Mota-Campo's long criminal history in this country is as follows: 1992...abduction 1993...assault (2), DUI 1995...DUI, vehicular assault 1997...maiming, drunk in public 1998...attempted robbery 2003...DUI 2004...DUI, domestic violence (beating his wife and son) 2005...threatening to kill The day after Mota-Campos was arrested with his 2004 DUI, he brutally attacked his wife and son. Fearing for her life, his wife then took their child and went into hiding. A few months later, he threatened to cut off the head of his wife's social worker with his machete because she would not tell him the whereabouts of his wife and child. Court documents reveal that Mota-Campos told her that "her sweet little head can come right off." Though convicted numerous times on DUI charges, Mota-Campos has never served more than a 30-day sentence for that charge. Authorities point to the fact that he has used 16 different names as well as phony identification papers as the reason for the rather light punishment. This, despite his admission in 1993 to an immigration agent that he had killed someone while driving drunk in Mexico City. Mota-Campos has entered this country illegally through the states of California, Arizona, and Texas. This case is disgusting. However, it is certainly by no means unusual. The United States is filled with violent criminals who have entered this country illegally and who have no regard for human life. On January 11, 2008, police arrested Mexican national Santana Batiz Aceves in Arizona and based on DNA evidence, charged him with 47 counts of rape. Police believe that Aceves is the notorious Chandler rapist, responsible for many child-rapes. The string of rapes began in 2006. The 39 year old illegal alien had already been deported twice for drug charges in California. Aceves also faces charges of kidnapping, aggravated assault, sexual abuse of a minor, giving police false information, providing false documents, and trespassing. Aceves was working as a heavy equipment operator and lived very close to two junior high schools. These are but two of the many thousands of previously deported illegal aliens who have re-entered the United States, only to harm our citizens. They steal taxpayer services, they drive drunk on our highways, they kill our police officers, and they victimize our children. Until the federal government actually gets serious about defending our border with Mexico, rather than actually encouraging the current invasion, it will continue to be open-season on American citizens. Perhaps, one day, we will be smart enough to elect a leader who will take their oath of office seriously, rather than another corrupt businessman who is willing to look the other way. "United States is stupid...I come back every time." Those words were spoken by Mexican national Rolando Mota-Campos to an immigration agent after his 11th arrest in the United States. Incredibly, Mota-Campos has been deported three times and has vowed to return again after completing his prison term and yet another undeniably meaningless deportation to Mexico. Mota-Campos whose face is adorned with a teardrop tattoo, stood in a Norfolk, Va. federal courtroom in October 2007 to be sentenced for threatening to cut off a social worker's head with a machete. http://www.alipac.us/article4214.html more

Resolved Question: Rate/ hate rap verse; 1 - 10?

Goin wild, buyin clothes that go out of style monetary mind-state equivilent to a child's thats the fact my generation cant seem to stay intact club routine like sniffin loose crack and abuse, herb treated like an hourly snack more pregnancies than casualties in Iraq its a damn shame, your membranes in the wrong lane Nigga's are lacklust with fetishes for Lil Wayne untamed, like Dead Prez you need discipline stop followin trends and get ur ass on a mission more

Resolved Question: who had a more messed up life Eminem or Micheal Jackson?

Eminem mom treated him bad, did a lot of pills ignored him and diddnt believe in him and his dad walked out on him his wife cheats on him gives him so much controversy and abuses him his children hate that he is a rapper and is never home they try hard to make sure he doesnt leave and they dont trust him, He has to deal with the fact that most critics hate him and a lot of ppl do for no reason even though he is a great rapper he can die any second. Micheal Jackson's dad diddnt let him have a child hood he made him become a singer when he was like 8. MJ had many problems with surgery and controversy and wasn't able to leave his own house. Then he got charged with false charges for doin sexual stuff to little boys twice. He had a great singing career that no one respected from 2000, to now when he is dead. he also had to take pills from pressure and paine of his life. so who do you think had it worse more

Resolved Question: What kind of a mother/father are they?

Can you imagine or believe that a mother who gave birth to a girl would prefer her money rather than her daughter's life? I have a close friend who is having a mild heart disease. Before she went for check-up, she suspected that she's having an angina (pain in the chest associated with heart disease). Then when told, they just brushed it aside and said that it might just be other kind of small symptoms that will subside. My friend wasn't satisfied but was patient. She then went for a heart diagnosis and truly being told by the doctor in charge that she really has a mild cardiovascular disease. And when shown the proof, they were silent. On other case, my friend was suspecting too she's going to have a chicken pox/german measles as she felt the early symptoms of it eg. fever, small round pus-like liquid grew over parts of her body but not much yet, and when accidentally burst, it grew again. When she told her parents, they just brushed aside with similar reason. And when proven, they kept quiet. My friend can be called a victim of child abuse in her home since she was small by her 'psychotic' mother whom had a bad childhood herself with her mother. And she is treating my friend just like she was being treated. She was like so stingy enough to spend some money on health stuff and will abuse my friend if she buys some supplement for her own protection. It's like, money to her is more important than health. In fact, my friend got that heart disease is because of prolonged stress of being patient with her parents. Whatever she does with good intention as a daughter, was unrecognised and was looked down upon. But what makes her shocked and grateful is that the doctor said she initially has this illness 10 years ago, but just discovered it lately. She is so grateful that she could still live like normal all this while though she felt some pain until recently the pain was unbearable. What I want to emphasize or ask here is, shouldn't a good mother (which she always claim to be) treat her daughter not like she was being treated badly? It was as if she is hurling her bad past onto my friend. And when my friend brought this up, she said that my friend is insolent. No one believes her when she tried to seek solace from relatives coz her parents are acting 'nice' just to look good by others. I love her and care for her. She has endured her mother's abuse and her father's cowardice who is scared to upright justice all these while with high optimism/pray that one day she will be separated from them. I used to assure her that God will protect the innocent and will punish those who do bad, parents are included. p.s. A nice mother wouldn't want the same mishaps to happen to her children the way she was treated badly in order to get the good returns of the children. Did Mary throw Jesus off and abuse him when he was growing up?But what makes me mad is relatives too blame my friend without knowing the truth and believe her parents and the idea of looking at them 'running away' scott-free fumes me! But at least, i'm glad you (Loli) understand that not all parents are good. :)because we are talking about death here, life and death. more

Resolved Question: What are my options now I'm possibly facing charges?

Long story short - I was casually seeing a guy for two years. We have had children together and continued seeing each other on a semi regular basis after each child was born. We stopped talking between July and October of last year due to differences. - He got himself a new girlfriend just before the end of September who has family where we both live, but she lives 200 miles away. He and I got back in touch in October (they had been together 3 weeks at this point) and we started talking about seeing each other again, despite the fact he was with her. We started an "affair" soon after and she found out over Christmas. Since then the three of us have been involved in text abuse (I guess that's the best word). Her telling me he doesn't want anything to do with me, him telling me he wants me but doesn't know how to end things without hurting her, me saying I'm going to kick her ass if she doesn't leave me alone. ETC ETC The night she found out I received a phone call at 4.57am from her. I didn't answer because I was asleep and it woke me up, then I proceeded to receive 16 further phone calls, some texts threatening me, and two voicemails saying I better watch my back and I was going to stay the f*ck away from him or she'd sort me out. Unfortunately voicemails only store on my phone for 10 days and I had no way of transferring it to another medium. So I have no evidence left of that voicemail, just some text messages. Since then she's told me countless times he loves her and wants me to leave him alone. Yet him and I have seen each other since and continued our relationship all the while with her believing (because he told her) that he wants nothing to do with me =\ She left a further voicemail on my phone in January telling me it was over with, they weren't going to play my games anymore. He'd said enough times to me that he wants me out of his life, she said if I contact him again she will take it as a personal attack against her and file harassment charges against me! Since this voicemail was left, he and I saw each other again. He came to my house, we talked a lot and he said while he is in Uni he thinks it's best if we don't talk until the end of the school year (June) so that he can clear his head, get over the crap of the past couple of months, and then once Uni was finished we could talk again and hang out etc and possibly get back together. We then slept together, and when he left we were both happy about what we'd arranged and it seemed to be fine. A week later I received a message from her to my Facebook account saying to leave him alone, and get the hell out of the city that I live in. I never replied but then a few days later I saw her going into his house so stupidly text him telling him to tell her if she ever messaged me again I'd kick her head in. Later that night she called me and after a rant it was decided all three of us would meet at mine and discuss what had been happening. When they arrived I made sure I had something hidden to record the conversation if I needed evidence at a later date. She was gobby and rude and basically repeated what she had said in the voicemail, he was stood there arms folded looking at the floor. When he went to answer questions she kept speaking over him not letting him speak and did the same to me. I told her it was done with, I just wanted to move on and forget it all (because of the conversation him and I had had previously) and eventually they left. I text him the next night just telling him what my personal feelings were and I spoke about our children and what I wanted. She then called me half an hour later saying he had forwarded the text to her and she once again said she was filing harassment charges. Until yesterday I hadn't heard anything from either of them. I received a phone call in the morning from a police officer asking me to go to the station to discuss allegations of harassment made against me by him and her. To say I'm confused would be an understatement. This guy has played me for a fool and me being in love with him, has meant I've fallen for all the bulls*it. I have texts and msn conversations between him and myself where he states quite clearly that he wants to be with me etc and she had been told this but chose to ignore it. He's lied to both of us and now because of that I am possibly being charged with harassment. The evidence I have, to show he has happily engaged in conversation etc with me apparently isn't good enough. I just do not know what to do. He made me so many promises and sweet talked me and now he's swanning about with this cretinous b*tch and they're playing happy families while I'm now in the sh*t. Does anyone have any advice for me? I've read up on what the UK law says about charges of this nature but the information and boundaries are so vast it's confusing me. I feel so hurt, used and betrayed. Before anyone says I deserve it for having a relationship with someone elsSarcasm, wit, stupid comments or anything similar aren't required. Don't reply if you're just going to respond like a child would. more

Voting Question: Now, give me your honest opinion on Twilight (sorry for being so, um, cliche...)?

I really am curious. I'm going to give my honest review and I want yours. Go ahead, try to contradict me. Oh, and just so you know I've read ALL. FOUR. BOOKS. Twilight was one piece of garbage I really wish I'd never even touched on. The characters were two dimensional and the whole series promoted just *AWESOME* things to teenagers, like: - Abuse is love! - If your lover leaves you, kill yourself - Psh, stalking is caring! - Pedophilia is completely okay. - Looks are all that matter in a relationship It's awfully written. I found it painful to even go back one page and try to pick out all the grammatical errors. It could also be considered 'thesaurus rape'. Also, the book was one big contradiction after another. SM completely tripped over her own two feet trying to add things, fit two and two together, almost like shoving two wrong puzzle pieces together and hoping nobody would notice. Now, those of you who are going to say "Oh, he does it because he cares about her...", don't go there. Stalkers also 'care' about their prey. The book promotes it's totally normal for a vampire to break into a 17 year old girls home to watch her sleep, and to break into her car to rip apart her engine to keep her from seeing a friend. Also, note the fact that several times in each book Edward and Bella tell eachother that they'd kill themselves if anything happened to the other one. Also, Edward is portrayed as 'perfect', which makes him impossible to relate to. Stephenie also touches constantly on looks but not values. Bella is a whiny, socially-challenged annoying teenager that, withing two weeks, falls for a controlling, possessive, abusive 108 year old vampire. Note that Bella constantly was focused on Edwards looks alone, like: Oh my GOD, he's SO hot, and he's also really hot, oh, and did I mention he's kind of like, HOT!? Edward treated Bella like a child the entire story, and only loved her because she smelled nice and he found it oh-so intriguing that he couldn't read her mind. They had a very abusive relationship that included smoldering glances. That's love, all right. Also, the book promotes pedophillia. Honestly, a 17 year old falling in love with a grandfather inside the body of a 17 year old? Really? Likewise, a 17 year old werewolf falling in love with a baby. Now, I know you're going to try the pull the old, "But he's gonna wait 'til she's older!". Still, it is considered child grooming. This book had lots of disturbing messages. The fourth book was by far the worst of all. Where do I begin? Renesmee, perhaps? Renesmee makes NO sense if you think about Meyer's previous statements that venom replaces all other bodily fluids. Oh, okay. All good. WAIT. How did Edward's YOU KNOW WHAT do YOU KNOW WHAT? Eh? There's also her quick aging. I'm pretty good at math, let's see if I can figure this one out. No aging + average aging = quick aging!? The thing I was looking forward to was sacrifice. There was none. SM CONSTANTLY stated that Bella would have to sacrifice everything to become a vampire. Well, she got to see Charlie, keep Edward, Jacob, become a vampire, and a baby to boot. That's real sacrifice if I ever saw it. The secondary characters just proved that everybody loves Bella because she's so perfect. And the ending was by far the most awful disappointment of all. Oooh, the Volturi are coming! They talk. Woah, Bella shields them! A few vampires go running, wait, they're under control now. Alice is back! Yay, happy ending. I could go on, but, you know. I want YOUR opinion now. Personally, I'll stick with Harry Potter, thank you very much.Blythe T : I'm not making any comments whatsoever on the books, so I'm not sure where you're coming from on that. Also, I understand it's fiction. But I find it no excuse. I just don't like it, I don't find it to be decent literature.EDIT: I meant not making any comments on the films. more

Resolved Question: <v^>Random<v^>Questions<^v>?

1. What is Victoria's Secret? 2. If a man says something in the middle of a forest with no women around to hear him, is he still wrong? 3. Why do we have the Easter Bunny and not the Easter Chicken? 4. If you make olive oil by squeezing olives is baby oil child abuse? 5. if a dog couldn't find a hydrant would they settle for a fire extinguisher or are they in fact better being rarely within dog pissing range? 6. Who would win in a fight, 50 staypuft marshmallow men with tanks and giant sockmonkeys or Chuck Norris? 7. Who was the pervert that thought of selling cow milk? 8. How did we discover penguins? Did we just decide, lets go over to that icy wasteland for fun?! 9. Why are there no glow in the dark headlights for cars in an effort to "go green"? 10. Why aren't the Soggy Bottom Boys a real band? BONUS: Name as many refrencences to the characters in the questions as you can! :) (If you know your classic movies, this should be easy)if u dont like my question dont answer it. its kinda simple realy. more

Resolved Question: Liberals say they are against the death penalty but are they really?

After all, one of the arguments they give for abortion is that a child who grows up in a "substandard" home will (their word, not mine) grow up to be a criminal. That children who are abused grow up to be abusers, rapists, killers, drains on society, etc. I will absolutely agree that some of them do. Some of them DON'T, however. So are they not, in fact SUPPORTERS of the death penalty who simply advocate it's use before the person ever commits a crime or is even born? Are they then, for all intents and purposes, advocates of the "pre-emptive death penalty"? After all, many people who commit crimes that qualify for the death penalty did indeed grow up in the type of homes that Liberals say children should NOT be born into, right? Of course, many grew up in wonderful homes, too and still turn out bad. Guess Liberals aren't as gung ho about free will as they seem to think. They don't seem to believe that a person should be allowed to grow up and decide what kind of person they will be and be held accountable for their actions AFTER they do them. (We all know they they will now back off of this belief now that it is posed to them in just this way and say they don't feel that way but we all ALSO know that they have said it time and time and time again.)I'm not a Conservative and I have ZERO problems with my tax dollars going to help children.And by the way... I personally don't think abortion should be a political issue. I think it is a common sense issue: if you know ANYTHING about human development, then you know that a fetus is not a clump of cells, therefore whether abortion kills babies does not need to be an argument. To me it isn't. The only argument is WHY.Last Paladin: I say again tha to me, abortion is not a political issue. Therefore, I give a f_ck about the government's stance on it. My issue is with the women who have them, legally or illeglly. And by the way, abortion IS an easy decision. It is the easiest one you can pick. That's why over 40% of women who have an abortion have had at least TWO PREVIOUS ABORTIONS. 15 minutes in an operating room and your problems are solved. The woman's rights argument means nothing to me and I AM a woman. You LOSE all right to be selfish the MINUTE you find out you are pregnant. PERIOD. You want to be the only one with control over your reproductive organs, right? So you have it. So excercise some control and STOP GETTING PREGNANT.lawrence: I see your point and in my case, I am pro-life for all those who have not forefeited their right to live by egregiously taking another person's (or people's) life in a manner so heinous that they cannot be allowed around others ever again because they are that dangerous. more

Resolved Question: Should my mom file a missing persons report?

Well, My sister married some douche bag she only knew for 4 months, (they met and the second day after meeting they were going and and the same week they decided to get engaged and married in april, they met in January) So, he told us his past, he had a sad past, he was abused by his mom when he was little, he got into drugs and gangs as a teen, he had sex with a 10 year old girl when he was 12 and I guess the parents pressed charges and he is a registered sex offender (level 1 so it's not usually on his records or something like that) Well, my religion is christian and he said he found god and he's in a better place now, he seemed like a cool guy, he acts "gangster" he's in a hip hop group called Godz Gang, which is also a church so we were all like cool. I still didn't fully trust him, but all seemed good. Until.. My sister (22 has three kids from a previous relationship) came to my mom saying she might be pregnant, see my sister still lives with us and my mom told her she didn't want him spending the night, but SURPRISE! she didn't listen. My mom got mad and said she should have listened or at least use birth control, because her last child was born premature, and he is a little slower than where a normal 2 year old should be, and he has a lot of health problems so he needs her a lot. They got in an argument and my sister out of the whim, decided to move out and move into a dirty motel for a week. Anyways, that was all straightened out, they got married, we weren't fighting (she ignored everyone because of the stupid fight with my mom) they got their own apartment, well you see her husband who we don't really know AT ALL. got her into the church, which she started acting all weird and would say off the wall things that weren't really christian at all. All of a sudden she got this hatred for everything that wasn't christian or wasn't right in her mind, she was never like this she was quite the party girl. anyways, she treated her like shit excuse my language but he would walk into our house and use our computer like he owned it, he would even kick me off. He has ADHD and ADD. He doesn't take medication for it, so he's off the wall all the time. He would say rude things about my family like making fun of one of my cousins for being morbidly obese, (when in fact he is too and has man boobs) and just rude things you don't say to family now he was apart of the family. Well my aunt didn't like him at all and said something like "you better watch out if you mess with her" and my sister wrote my mom a letter saying she was done and she wanted nothing to do with out family. Her poor innocent kids (6,4,2 is how old they are) were very close to me and my brother and my mom, well now they are all of a sudden denied access to not just my side of the family, but also their dads side of the family whom they were also pretty close with. We haven't contacted her since September, she put a restraining order against my mom saying these RIDICULOUS things, like she stole her truck and set it on fire and that she is mentally ill, and that she made me call her a bitch, which I just think she is. My mom had nothing to do with that. My mom also can't drive because she has panic attacks behind the wheel. I am worried, apparently, she let his best friend babysit her kids and my mom just looked at the records and if it is him, he has about 7 pages of criminal records, and stuff including threatening to kill someone. She hasn't been on myspace, she hasn't been at the church, her husband has been answering her cell phone. I'm worried that these kids and her could be somewhere dead, he threatened to slash his own moms tired at their family reunion, and he spray painted our rode. my mom is worried, we have gave her time to settle down, live on her own, but it's been since September since we have tried to contact her, my other family members have tried but no success. I know in the first place she did not want to contact any of us. The thing is, that was 5 months ago, we are worried for the safety of her children and her, especially if her husband is a registered sex offender, and we don't know what he is capable of, since no one has heard from her since October, I am worried her and her kids could be laying in some ditch right now because I know he is capable of doing something bad. Would it be appropriate to file a missing persons report? Or what should my parents do in this type of situation?Also, the restraining order didn't go through, and he would belittle my sister and discipline the kids, against her will. He would ground them for no reason, and even spank them. CPS came to their door and told her he cannot be alone with the kids, but she still did it. my mom also did call cps not too long ago, because those kids need to get out of that home, they are probably under a lot of mental distress, The actual father is also going to try to take her to court to get visitation rights, and also my parents, but I'm not sure if she is okay.. more

Resolved Question: Can I be sued for defomation of character?

NOTE: Please only answer if you know the answer to this for a fact rather than your opinion...thanks! I have a neighbor/ex friend who I know a lot about. He is 42 years old. He told me that he came onto his little sister when they were children, he watches porn with minors in it (he's deleted all the evidence), he has physically, sexually, mentally and verbally abused his younger brother (I witnessed this). He is ALWAYS saying that he wants to hurt people and he wants to do "bad things". I believe that he is a potential serial killer, rapist and/or child molester based on things he's done in the past and the way he talks about things he wants to do. His family protects him, I personally think they are afraid of him. They have never called the police on him. I have called the police on him at least 3 times, once when he was chasing me in a car, another time when he broke into my house and another time when he was threatening suicide. Unfortunately the two times I was calling him when he was acting/being violent towards me, he wasn't caught due to technical problems, such as my roomate thought the police were there for him, so he lied to the police and the second time he ran away b4 the police got there and the police couldn't find him and left before I could give them his name and info. So basically there is no proof of him doing anything wrong/bad. I feel like I am obligated to warn all the other people in the neighborhood that he could potentially be dangerous, but I don't want to be sued for defamation of character. This man doesn't work, he is on disability, so it's not like his income/economic status will be affected. Also, could I still be sued if I state that it's MY OPINION that he could be dangerous rather than I know it for a fact? more

Resolved Question: My boyfriend is over-involved w/his ex(w/whom he has children) and now his mother want her 2 spend the night.?

So this is a long and bizarre story. I have known this guy for seventeen years an prior to our romantic involvement that started less than two years ago, I had no interest in him although he has always liked me. We are in our thirties now. I have a 10 yr. old from a previous relationship. We have always been friends however had huge gaps in our correspondence because I had a child, he went away to college, worked nightshift and got married. When we were 27(we are the same age) he got a seventeen yr. old girl pregnant and married her. It turned out to be a tumultous marriage. She physically abused him while he was in the military and living on base. She would hurt him and them call the police. She drank heavily, partied, cheated on him(even took out a loan for a lover putting up the family car for collateral). The biggest deal though was that she hid an entire pregnancy from him. They had already been married, had one child (who was 20 months old at siblings conception), and one abortion they both participated in. He was deployed part of the time. She didn't even tell her identical twin or mother(with whom she is close) that she was pregnant even though she moved back home to live and work with him during part of the deployment. She sought no medical attention even though it was free. Her first baby had been born via emergency C-section. She told no one she was pregnancy and also did not seek alternative care. She also binge-drank vodka on several occasions. In fact she came back home w/him when she was seven and a half months, and attended a large party thrown by his parents for her older child, surrounded by multiple relatives and told nobody. Two months later he is in one of his training classes and is pulled out by a superior and told his wife is going into labor. He is not sure if this baby is his, she looks NOTHING like her sister but he raises her as his own. She assumes he is involved with me one day(which he isn't) and sends me multiple harassing and vulgar text messages. Anyway, after the delivery, 14 months later he comes home for a three week leave on a fifteen month tour and she tells him she doesn't love him anymore and wants a divorce. He is devastated but eventually relents. He and I are not involved at this point. She makes harassing phone calls to me. He asks her about it. She denies it. They are now divorced. In 2008, they arranged a custody agreement for him to have the children five days a week. They come back from their mother's home disheveled and often dirty. They look tacky(but she doesn't), their hair is unbrushed and their nails overgrown with dirt underneath. This is amongst other neglectful behaviors. His mother becomes very angry with the ex daughter in-law because she has taken them on weekends when he is in Iraq and witnesses their commonly unacceptable appearance and mannerisms. When son returns(after leaving military for good to be with his children), he and his mother have a huge falling out due to his renewed relationship w/his children now that he will no longer have to be away from them. His mother have previously hated his ex-wife due to the wife squandering thousands(of husband's and mother-in-law's money), hateful, disrespectful language from the ex-wife, and continued neglect of the children. His mother decided to have bad will against me because I was an emotionally supportive friend of his and as he spent more time with his children, she seemed to become angrier. Well, I became pregnant. He and I now live together and have a child together. His ex-wife repeatedly calls her ex-husband for trivial matters even though she continues to neglect the children. She also repeatedly invited him for dinner. We reside in the old neighborhood in which I grew up. She invited him to go trick-or-treating with her(but didn't invite me) and said to him she would love to go trick-or-treating in my neighborhood but didn't want to run into me. He said nothing to her about this. She also has said disrespectful things about me to the children. He has said nothing about this. I have continually cared(meaning I take care of them)for her children by him in spite of the ugly way she has treated me. I have given them baths, have done their hair, dressed them, taken them to different activities, read to them. I don't expect praise. I just know that all children need to feel loved. I also do not speak poorly about her to the children. It is clear she is emotionally unstable though. The year where his mother stopped speaking to him, she then decided to like his ex-wife again. I now have a baby with him(I know). I decided to let bygones be bygones and let her meet her grandchild. His mother trivializes the abuse the wife has enacted against her son and overlooks the neglect she enacts towards the grandchildren. His ex-wife told him about the last time she had sex, how she was pregnant last year. It iBlending a family is an investment, right? I have my problems with this guy(who I am planning on leaving). We have are own problems. However if he was hitting her, it would not be trivialized as just a "flaw". When CPS, was called on her, the case was closed. People don't like to think of women as abusers. I can see, as an abuse vitime, he appears to be relating to her the same way as in marriage-as a vitime-walking on eggshells. However I think he sends her mixed messages and he thinks he doesn't. He spent Thanksgiving in her family's home, he attended a birthday party with her, went to his child's school event with her. I understand, that it is important to get along for the sake of the children, but she uses the children to have a relationship with her. She gets irritated that he doesn't spend more time with her. How is telling him the last time she had sex have anything to do with the children? His mother abused him, so it isn't surprising he stayed with a woman who didI mean she uses the children to have a relationship with him. He doesn't see it as inappropriate to text her at an odd hour or talk to her late at night, unrelated to the children. Also, he said when it comes to his mother offering her to spend the night, it is "none" of his business even though his Mom told him to tell it to her. Also, less than 1% of women conceal pregnancies to that degree, so it would appear to be more than just simply a "flaw".He has custody most days except she has them late afternoon Sunday through Tuesday morning.He has custody most days except she has them late afternoon Sunday through Tuesday morning. more

Voting Question: How to gain custody over a sibling from a grandparent?

my grandparent gained custody of my little sister when she was a baby from my mother and stepfather. Now at the age a 13 she says she has been abused the entire time she has lived there. A few people a have seen this and her other sister that lives with her says that she too had been abused but she stood up for herself and now my grandparent does not bother her anymore. she is extremely worried about her little sister. As she goes to school all day while my grandparent keeps my other little sister at home all day with no schooling, no friends, no communication. My grandparent is very old about is supposed to have open heart surgery but wont! My grandparent finally agreed to another family member to let her live with them but went to her house and took her back home. I have called the CPS they did nothing, in fact they talk to the children, the children told them everything and the investigator went back to my grandparent and told her everything they said. Also a state worker told my grandparent not only who called but how i was able to get the information about the abuse. What i want to know is what is my next step?Hire a lawyer or have everyone that knows about this abuse call the CPS again and have them do another investigation? more

Resolved Question: How can I start my life all over?

I cant get over the fact that i wanna start my life all over again. I wish i could go back to when i was born with all the memories and thought i have right now so i can change everything bad that has happened in my life.Im just barely a 15 years old highschool freshmen.Theres many reasons why i get on thinking about this. Growing up my parents divorced and my stepdad was a racist. Im Laotian and my stepdad was from a gang related Thai family. Through out elementary i would try to hit latinos when ever they spoke spanish cuz i was 3 and my stepdad taught me rasicm and i didnt know anything,i know thats terrible but now i know better.My big brother on the other hand is a bad person.Unlike other big brother he treated my like a slave.I had to do almost everything for him.At around 4th grade i moved to another school for getting suspended for over dozens of times cuz of my stepdad. It was the smallest school in the district and due to my family I was hated and a loner from 4th grade up to the end of jr. high in 8th grade.I became obese from depression of being hated at that school.Then people there now sees me as a freak cuz i do many retarted things back then.Middle school was worst for me.Still being hated i just sat at a bench during lunch for the next 2 years. I was a poor unhealthy child and i wasnt like everybody else.I didnt have great clothes,electronics,or a life.They would go to the park, parties,mall,movies while i was at home being taught bad things and being some sort of abused slave by my brother.Now highschool which is now.Im in the 2nd semester as a freshmen.Its alright and I have made some friends but they feel weird around me sometimes. The old students from my 2nd elementary think of me as a weirdo. My best friend even doesnt seem to like me much.He went to my 1st elementary.Half of my friends i have now went there.I could have known them earlier but i moved schools.And finally right now,... still extremely depressed with no life unlike most teens who have one. Im a dude by the way. please nothing rude. more

Resolved Question: How can I stop him from getting our son and mentally abusing him?

My son is near 2 years of age, and his "father" and I have NOT been together since I was 3 months pregnant with Jaxson, (I left him, that's another story). Since this time, Jaxson's "father" refuses to come see him, pays the minimum $6 a WEEK Child Support even though he brags about making between $600-$2000 a day! Now, in Jaxson's first year of life, I flew him up to Brisbane too see his father and after that I decided, No more, time you start making an effort. (I lived in Sydney at the time). Any who, he has been down to see Jaxson ONCE, and that was for a pathetic 2 days. He now claims he wants more rights and as a father he wants Jaxson up in where ever it is he lives now, without me being around. I keep saying no, as I would fear for both of our safety. He has threatened that if he knew where he lived, he would come take Jaxson from me and take him up to live with him. Mind you Jaxson has NO idea who he is. He doesn't get b'day cards or xmas cards or anything. Now, he also has dvo's out against him, one being from his former partner whom he has another 2 children too (which he also makes no effort). He is mentally unstable, although not proven. Very controlling, mentally abusive, physically (never has been, yet, to either myself or Jaxson) abusive, drives unlicensed, does burnouts and stupid things with children in the car). Yet these sort of men still get rights to their children. How do I stop him from doing such things as if he gets a hold of Jaxson, he will end up growing up disturbed like his "father" and will come home to me calling me a whench or skank. Please note, I AM NOT suggesting all men are bad fathers, in fact I think there are alot of really good fathers, unfortunately its people like Jaxson's "father" that give the rest a bad rep. So please, I am not referring to every male, simply Jaxson's so called Dad.We haven't been to court, so their is nothing official. Jaxson has been with me since day one! more

Resolved Question: wondering, why do we always ache over the ones who've hurt us the most in life?

Here I am again, crying over my lost relationship with my parents when they should be the ones crying. I couldn't put up with their controlling and drug abuse and after over 25 years I finally said goodbye. But my heart still aches over missing them (the good times that were few and far in between), and knowing the fact that they did not try to reconcile with me at all... they just let me go, and that hurts sooooo bad. I can't understand what parent in the whole world wouldn't try to resolve a conflict to keep a relationship with their child... especially when their child has spent a lifetime trying to do nothing but please them. How do I make the hurt go away??? I hurt so much and it depresses me so badly... no amount of therapy seems to be helping... I go once every other month because that's what I can afford - and it is on a sliding scale. I'm just so sad and want it to stop hurting - I want to not care about them the way they don't care about me...thanks to the jerk who accuses me of not being a Christian. Chrisianity is love, and I love them, which is why this hurts so much. God NEVER promised a life without pain. more

Resolved Question: how do you define when a child should be removed from thier home?

Yesterday as I was on Y/A I hear loud conversations outside. It turns out that there is this family who's relatively still new to the neighborhood. They moved here from another state and they have 4 children. I want to say first that I know the parents love thier kids. They show them affection, talk to them politely, and they children are well behaved. They're also poor (and manage whatever money they get poorly. I have to admit they do not know how to priortize at all.) So now, these people are extremely filthy. The kids are always dressed in dirty clothes, being clean & cleaning are not important to them at all (and in my opinion, for an adult to not want to wash thier filthy behind is one thing, but when it comes to children they should always be clean, always look better than the parent.) The children that are school aged have missed many days of school over the past 3-4 months. The school grades are poor and I suspect the parents don't help with homework. Thier lights & water have been shut off twice for several days (including now.) I feel really bad for those kids as fas as how they live and how the parents priorities are not on the children's hygiene or homework, and how they rather buy stupid things than pay thier bills on time. But like I first said, the never yell at thier kids or hit them, they talk to them lovingly, the children are well mannered, etc. I haven't ever seen the parents argue / fight, nor do I suspect any drug or alcohol abuse. They're just dirty & school isnt a priority, etc. etc. Do you think it was right that Child Protective Services removed these kids from thier home, from thier parents. (Aside from the fact the utilities are shut off. Last time they were placed in a hotel by CPS until the utilities were back on.) Or do you think a plan should have been placed first and foremost (the "plan" would have given the parents the opportunity to straighten up thier lives and better thier parenting, such as take parenting classes, etc.) What do you think about all this? I feel really, really bad for the kids because they don't understand thier situation and now they're in some stranger's home for an extended period of time, away from thier parents that they love regardless of the home situation, etc. etc. I just want opions on these kinds of situations (no abuse etc but removed from the home.) Please dont be nasty because I'm a child counselor and an advocate for children & parents. I'm just wondering how others see this. Thanks. more

Resolved Question: Am I just too jealous or is he the one with the issues?

My husband seems to gravitate mostly to women. At work he's known as the charming guy so handsome and nice blah blah blah. When they meet me they are like your wife is so pretty and your husband talks about you all the time. Is talking about me a way for him to appeal, women love a family man. What they don't know is that my husband went to jail for two years for embezzlement and prior to those two years, he would go on dating websites, go to strip clubs, use drugs and even went out with a girl who claimed it never went beyond just lunch and talking but he did lie and told her we were separated living in separate homes. Once he had this female friend, just a friend he knew long before me, but I ended up calling her once and she didn't even know he had gotten married. She once called him because her boyfriend had beat her and when we went to her house to see if she was okay she did not want for me to see her bruised up so he made me and our new born wait in the car for about 30 min. His mom constantly uses him even though she basically abandoned him as a child, but he still runs to her rescue every time she calls. Same thing goes for other women he meets and it just always seems that he needs to go rescue a female in trouble. I know his sister sexually abused him as a child and his mother is a piece of work. He claims women have cheated on him before in relationships. It would seem to me that he would hate women but yet he seems to get along with them better than with men. He hides the fact the he helps allot of women and I eventually find out but I find out from others never from him. This upsets me, I want my husband to focus on me and my daughter, why can't he give me that Why am I always second even after being there for him for the past two years while he was in jail and no one else cared to see him. I waited for him and gave him another chance. Funny thing is even when he was in jail he became pen pals with another inmates girlfriend. Does he have issues? Am I just too jealous and do I have a reason to be? more

Resolved Question: Can I sue my parents for this?

I was circumcised and it ruined my life I just don't understand how some sick f**k could do that to me and love me and I really do hope they burn in hell for it how the hell is this s**t is even legal it's f**king child abuse! Anyone who does that to a poor defenseless baby should be killed! hell why not just chop a babies arm off to! anyone who even thinks of circumcising their kids are completely sick in the head it's vile disgusting and just plain wrong! I was unfortunate to see a video of it and it was highly disturbing they strap the baby down and it even goes into shock afterwords! I've been cutting myself ever since I found out and have even been made fun of about being circumcised! I was just wondering if I can sue their asses for it it might not make me forgive them but at least they would learn their lesson but i wish i could have them tortured and see how they like it... bunch of sick mother**ckers deserve all the pain in the world and I'll be sure to dance on their grave! P.S. Yes, I've heard about restoration and it doesn't change the fact that I was assaulted and turned into some kind of freak!@ Ford Craney: You are a complete douchebag and deserve to get your ass kicked would you say that to someone who was raped? NO! And anyone else if you don't have anything nce to say DON'T say it!!I live in Canada and only 20% of people are cut here and someone asked me if I was and I said yes and they laughed at meI DON'T love my parents and I NEVER will ever again I just feel sick around them!And for the "religious" reasons... F**K RELIGION!! Since when was it an excuse to abuse children?! more

Resolved Question: Why do parents let their little boys play with toy guns?

Why is it that some parents allow 6-year old boys to play with toy guns, play fight, climb trees and wrestle? I for one think any parent who allows their kids to play fight or play with toy guns is a disgusting parent and should be locked up for abuse. In the UK parents who buy toy weapons for their children are IMPRISONED! I want the USA to pass strict government control laws like that! Children who play fight and play with toy weapons usually grow up tp be rapists and serial killers and that is a fact; there are now studies on child development and it shows playing violent games are bad for child development!Lydia --- Titus 2:5 - You sexist virgin! more

Resolved Question: I need help PLEASE, dont know what to do.?

We were at a party a few weeks ago and we both ended up pretty drunk and ended up making sweet weekly love again. As far as we knew I used a condom but then she started getting sick the next week and we didnt really think about it. She wasn't on the pill due to a few complications about other medication. Last week after she wasnt getting any better we talked about it and we got a home pregnancy test and the first one was a false negative but just to make sure we tried it 3 more times and all three other times it came out positive. I'm 22 and my girlfriend is 18. I know I love her and we've been together for about 4 years but this is causing a rift between us. I am not financially able to support a child and she has been untalkative and very distant from the problem at hand. She has been blackmailing me with telling my parents and forcing me to pay for clothes and speacial treatments every day now. She even wont let me hang out with any of my friends. The other night I was on the phone with my boss who is a 63 year old woman about a problem at work and my girlfriend heard me (I was in the kitchen) and threw a fit. She took the phone and yelled at my boss cussing at her and calling her a "geriatric whore". I tried to stop her and she shoved me against the counter and I fell on the floor and a plate fell on my face and knocked out two teeth and fractured another. Now I'm not only out of a job but I am scheduled for an oral surgeon which will cost me about 300 dollars with insurance to get it fixed. I dont know who to turn too. I cant leave her or she'll get her ex-military father to hurt me and tell my parents about the pregnancy. I dont plan on leaving her because I love her and I think it's just her hormones but I cant handle much more. She's hit me at least 5 times today and it's not like I'm going to hit her back. She's making me have sex with her at least twice a day and it's really uncomfortable for me knowing she's pregnant and the fact that she makes me let her urinate on my face every time we do it which is a very new thing to me. Before she was a loving caring person who wouldnt hurt anyone and now she's not only abusing me but she's making the kids she baby sits as a side job watch us have sex. The kids are a 5 year old girl and a 7 year old boy. The parents have no idea and her behavior gets worse. She's started drinking more and more and has started stealing pills from the family she babysits and I'm afraid she's harming not only herself but our unborn child. I really need advice. Please serious answers only I'm dead serious about this and I dont appreciate being called a "troll". more

Resolved Question: Is this considered child abuse?

So on Friday i got my 2 month old daughters ears pierced. I took her to my dads house before we went home and my step mom said that i was being ridiculous and that was child abuse. I just replied with are you kidding me? And i finally got fed up with her attitude and left because she wouldn't stop going on about it. I think they are adorable and so does her father and the rest of my family but i can't get over that. Piercing my child's ears is not child abuse is it? My step mom said i needed to wait until she was around 15 to get them done. So i want every ones opinion on this please. Is getting my daughter's ears pierced at 2 months old child abuse? Am i ridiculous? Thank you guys :) (Oh and she said that this all goes back to me being a teen mom...i see nothing to do with the fact that i am a teenager and i have a baby) So is it just me or is she crazy?I wasn't 15 when i had my baby but my step mom said i should wait until she was 15 to alow her to get them done. Thank you all 4 ur answers :) more

Voting Question: I have applied to get my permanent residency in the u.s ..............?

I have applied to get my permanent residency in the u.s but my husband just found out that he has to appear in court and has requested to appear electronically due to the fact that we do not live in Florida anymore and if that does not get approved to appear electronically then a warrant for his arrest will be filed ,will that ruin my chances of being approved for my permanent residency ,oh i also have an I-864A form that i have field as well because my husbands income is not enough so my step father signed to be a joint sponsor since we all live under the same roof ,my husband and i also have a 4 month old child together who was born in the u.s. My husband was asked to go to a barterer intervention course in Florida and did not and that is what he has to appear in court for but was not arrested for any kind of abuse Basically my question is if he gets a warrant for his arrest for that will that ruin any chances i have of being approved Please if anyone can give me some insight into this situation i would really appreciate it signed Very Worriedfor ibu guru no he is not a barterer his jealous baby mother was making false accusations which we have evidence to that fact , and no he did not miss the court date yet he requested to have it done electronically and is waiting to see if the judge will approve it and 3rd if u actually read what i had wrote then i wouldn't have to write this to u so if u or anyone else does not have an actual answer to my questions and only wanna comment so u can make judgments to a situation that u know nothing about then please don't bother posting anything at all because this a serious matter . with that being said only serious people with real answers please reply thank you very much . more

Resolved Question: Could God be punishing me?

I'm 18 and a guy. Honestly, I know I'm going to get some judgments for this, and you know what, that's fine. I won't take away anybody's right to be angry. If anything I feel the same as you do. Well, I'm just going to admit it. I asked teenage girls to give me nude pictures of themselves. They were close to my age, but still underage. But that's not the worst part, I'm getting to it. I've also used my webcam to masturbate for random girls(or guys pretending to be girls). Yeah, I know, not very good. But the worst part is that since I was around 14, I've sporadically been looking up pictures of young girls, and I mean really young. I've even tried to talk to 12 year old girls in chat rooms, and one even sent me a pic of herself(again, most likely a guy). And the absolute worst part is that I actually participated in trading these kinds of pictures. I suppose maybe I fit the definition of a sex offender. I think this may represent the fact that I'm very lonely. All my life I've been criticized by my family. Not only that, but I've put up with mental abuse and manipulation. I've seen my dad hit my mom and throw temper tantrums. As a result, I developed depression and social anxiety. Now, I don't have any friends and I don't have the ability to make friends. Being a sexual being like everybody else, I don't really get the opportunity to interact with girls my age. And any girl that ever liked me or though I was cute was overly obsessive. I guess the reason why I go on my webcam is to get girls to say that I'm cute, but most of them are probably lying anyways. I'm not sure I'm attracted to little girls because the thought just disgusts me and I would never want to be in any kind of sexual situation with one. But that doesn't change the fact that I saw this stuff and gave other pedophiles sexual satisfaction. I'm always depressed and nothing seems to work out for me. I figure that God is punishing me for engaging in such immoral behavior. And this just hurts me because I'm not a bad person and I care very much about other people. I wish to help people have better lives. And yet I'm being counter productive. The worst thing I ever saw was a video on limewire about a man sexually abusing a two year old in the bath tub. That image still haunts me to this day. At this point I knew my curiosity had serious consequences. Am I a pedophile? I don't know, and that's what scares me. I would never abuse a child like that in real life. I don't want to. I want kids of my own one day. I just feel like I'm completely f**ked up. I'm always miserable and socially anxious, but know I think I'm starting to see why that is. I've been going to counseling, but I haven't told her this. I'm just trying to figure out why the hell I actually participated in this. Do you think that I'm begin punished by God? By the way I made sure to delete everything from my computer so I wouldn't have to look at that filth. more

Resolved Question: How can I learn to love m mother...?

I am 19 and have always felt so distant from my mum. I know I love her deep down but I honestly dont think the feeling is mutual. Ever since I can remember, I have felt neglected. In fact, I honestly dont remember ever getting a hug from my mum. I certainly didnt get any after my infant years. M mum would constantly abuse me emotionally and still does it to date. When I was a very young child, I considered running away several times. I was always very close to my dad and loved him alot. He always told me I was his daughter and that I shouldnt feel bad about my mum. He told me that I am not close to my mum because I was weaned rather than breast fed. Until my early teenage years, I always thought that that was the reasoning behind her love for me- or lack thereof. Ever since I hit puberty, I started to fend for myself. I found the early years very difficult as my mother would harm me emotionally. When I started my period, I didnt tell anyone in my family but my mum knew and bullied me about it. I vividly remember having to steal money just to buy pads. When my body started changing, she also made fun of me. She asked me to hide my chest or she would ask me why I wasnt ashamed of it. I had to buy bras and hide them from her. As the years passed by, she realised I was independant and not in need of her yet she would still abuse me. She would belittle me and make fun of me. When I cried, she'd laugh. I always tried my best to handle it calmly but sometimes she'd push me too far and I'd retaliate in the wrong manner. e.g I'd tell her that I wished she weren't my mum. I was always envious of other peoples relationships with their mothers and still am. I know that their must be reasons to why my mum always neglected me and I honestly have forgiven her. Its just that I cant seem to love her after a certain point. I feel like my life would be better without her and I just find it so difficult accepting any sort of "kindness" of gestures of love from her now. How can I stop myself being so distant? A simple thing like a compliment from her can make me furious iside. I cry because I feel like she is manipulating me or lying. Or that this is just another in line of her attempts to belittle me. I really dont know what to do. more

Voting Question: How to get a spouse out of the home legally?

This man who we can call X is stil legally married to me. There have been many problems with verbal abuse to me, physical issues of getting up in my face, using profanity to me privately and in front of the children (teens to elementary age), body butting, squeezing my hand hard, hitting me in the arm with his fist, etc. I have tried for 3 years to get him out of the home to get on with his life. I have told him we have no marriage, I don't want you, don't love you. You need to go. He continues to remain. We have not had a physical relationship or emotional one is about 3 years. He has resided in the master bedroom alone for 3 years. I have a bed in one of my children's room. I do not cook for him, clean for him, or provide anything anymore. He doesn't exist to me. I have tried legally to get him out to no avail. I was granted a domestic violence injunction at one point only to have it dismissed on the grounds he did not own a weapon nor did I feel he would murder me or beat me senseless. I then started calling the police as advised to "build a case" which after a few times resulted in the advise from police that if I called again, my children would be removed from the home as it would be deemed I had them living in an unstable, unsafe environment. I also had the police tell me that if it was so unbearable, then I needed to leave with my kids and go sleep on someone's floor. They stated that X had every right to be there and they couldn't make him leave regardless of how he was mentally abusing me. Can't seem to get a restraining order due to lack of physical violence other than the body butting and a few punches that did little more than hurt like hell but didn't leave a mark. I was also advised by the police that I could be arrested for changing the home locks. If I packed his stuff and set it outside the door or took it to his job, he would only bring it back angrier than ever. I hate to subject my kids to anymore of his yelling, insults, profanity and anger with doing that. Besides, just putting his stuff out isn't going to keep him out. I am no longer dependent on him financially as I was just court ordered child support so my kids can at least be assured they will eat and I can pay the electric and water. Finances are not an issue other than I don't have $3000 to $5000 for an attorney retainer fee to initiate a divorce. I have already had my share of free consultations to know this for a fact. And no attorney will take the case pro bono..no one really does that anymore. I have also appealed to Legal Aide. I was denied assistance twice due to the fact he resides in the same home. They will not help as they are taking into consideration his income because he lives here part of the household and therefore denied me on that basis. I feel like I am going in a circle. How can this man be made to go. Why also does this nut hang on...control for one. Also I believe that as long as he is squatting here, he keeps me from having a life...plus I imagine he gets his thrills by tormenting me and humilitating me. I need someone with some legal background to advise or someone who has been my same path...To "Honey" I think you just can't read. I wasn't advised of my "rights". That was their conclusion because they didn't have an answer either! My children have been financially dependent on him and will be until they are 18. That is the law. I do have court ordered child support just 2 weeks ago. It is possible. You don't know how much digging and researching I had to do to find out how to go about it thru the State but it can be done. Let me educate you, "Honey", just because you are married doesn't take a man off the hook to provide for his kids..its the law. And its the law he provide financially for his wife too whether or not shes a $100K executive or a stay home mom. Now, the money to feed my kids comes thru the State not him. I don't have to beg him anymore. He pays the State or he goes to jail. We don't live together. He stays in an extra bedroom ALONE. Take me seriously. It is incomprehensible to get why someone stays in a marriage when their not wanted and they get nothing.To Know Guy: With what thousands of dollars am I going to hire this attorney with. more

Voting Question: How to legally get spouse out of the home.?

This man who we can call X is stil legally married to me. There have been many problems with verbal abuse to me, physical issues of getting up in my face, using profanity to me privately and in front of the children (teens to elementary age), body butting, squeezing my hand hard, hitting me in the arm with his fist, etc. I have tried for 3 years to get him out of the home to get on with his life. I have told him we have no marriage, I don't want you, don't love you. You need to go. He continues to remain. We have not had a physical relationship or emotional one is about 3 years. He has resided in the master bedroom alone for 3 years. I have a bed in one of my children's room. I do not cook for him, clean for him, or provide anything anymore. He doesn't exist to me. I have tried legally to get him out to no avail. I was granted a domestic violence injunction at one point only to have it dismissed on the grounds he did not own a weapon nor did I feel he would murder me or beat me senseless. I then started calling the police as advised to "build a case" which after a few times resulted in the advise from police that if I called again, my children would be removed from the home as it would be deemed I had them living in an unstable, unsafe environment. I also had the police tell me that if it was so unbearable, then I needed to leave with my kids and go sleep on someone's floor. They stated that X had every right to be there and they couldn't make him leave regardless of how he was mentally abusing me. Can't seem to get a restraining order due to lack of physical violence other than the body butting and a few punches that did little more than hurt like hell but didn't leave a mark. I was also advised by the police that I could be arrested for changing the home locks. If I packed his stuff and set it outside the door or took it to his job, he would only bring it back angrier than ever. I hate to subject my kids to anymore of his yelling, insults, profanity and anger with doing that. Besides, just putting his stuff out isn't going to keep him out. I am no longer dependent on him financially as I was just court ordered child support so my kids can at least be assured they will eat and I can pay the electric and water. Finances are not an issue other than I don't have $3000 to $5000 for an attorney retainer fee to initiate a divorce. I have already had my share of free consultations to know this for a fact. And no attorney will take the case pro bono..no one really does that anymore. I have also appealed to Legal Aide. I was denied assistance twice due to the fact he resides in the same home. They will not help as they are taking into consideration his income because he lives here part of the household and therefore denied me on that basis. I feel like I am going in a circle. How can this man be made to go. Why also does this nut hang on...control for one. Also I believe that as long as he is squatting here, he keeps me from having a life...plus I imagine he gets his thrills by tormenting me and humilitating me. I need someone with some legal background to advise or someone who has been my same path...For Actions have Consequences: No attorney, friend, family, or stranger has had a real solution. So why not ask Yahoo. Hoping I would find someone that might have an idea no one has thought of yet. Moving out of my home is not an option. If I move out, there is a law that states I abandoned the home, therefore I would actually be relinquishing all rights to the house. As for ownership, X stopped making payments 2 yrs ago out of spite to me to ruin my credit (which funded this house) so it is in foreclosure and there is $60K more owed on it than it is worth. There is nothing here to settle other than who wants to live here until the foreclosure is final or a loan modification is done if ever. Right to live here? At what, the mental anquish and emotional trauma that is delivered out of hatred of his own family? We have the right to NOT have to put up with it. There is 6 of us and just 1 of him..what makes more sense to leave?For John D: Move in with family or friends. Frankly, I don't have any friends that can or would take in 6 people and 2 dogs..Family is out of the immediate area which means I have to uproot 5 kids in the middle of a school year which will probably mean they will fail for the year. I have to also think about things relating to them. How they are living is not good for them or me either. Neither is uprooting their education. My family consists of an elderly mother and father in an independant living facility...Get real. Running is not the answer. Stand up and fight...but how? Pro Bono...nobody does nothing for free. Been there and done that.For Bob G: File myself? Probably the same thing will happen like it did when I filed the injunction...get laughed out of court..and he gets his hand slapped. Yeah, right. more

Resolved Question: Why do people think 1950's America was such a wonderful place?

You mean before the Civil rights movement, the Equal Pay Act for women the legislation protecting children from sexual abuse and the days long before Human Rights. The days when it was legal for a man to beat his wife and children. The days when children wandered off unsupervised. The days before health warnings on cigarettes and alcohol, the days before expiration dates on food, the days before bike helmet and seat belt laws. The days when homosexuals were locked up for engaging in consensual sex. The days when corporal punishment was commonplace in schools. The days when children were forced to pray and recite the pledge of alliance in school. The days when bullying was not only a fact of life but considered a 'right of passage'. The days when persons in authority were obeyed without question. The days when all fit young men were forced to do military service... The days when racial segregation was very common and heavily enforced The days of the Cold War, when there were planes constantly patrolling the skies armed with nuclear bombs, ready to drop them at a moment's notice. The days when abortion was illegal and young girls died from sticking broken glass bottles up themselves. I could go on and on............. more

Resolved Question: ex wife accusing me of sexual assault?

Hi I need some advice ..back ground 2 daughters 6 and 8 was married for 7 years wife left me for another man. Was seeing kids every weekend for 4 weeks then they started to say they did not want to come to mine anymore. Whet to mothers house got in a row in front of kids (she says I hit her and I was found guilty in court for ABH suspended sentence) I never hit her she set me up. I have not seen the girls for 16 months now. She has a residential order so the girls live with her and her new soon to be husband. 8 year old has said I have sexual assaulted her I was arrested but no charges was bought I have never touched her I think it’s the mother telling her what to say we had a section 7 report done and the social work said the girls did not want to see me and told him about being sexual assaulted and she has told her chams worker and teachers . the mother has claim domestic violence which again is UN true and again the kids have said they have seen me hit her. At court, the judge wanted to know if the mother had couched the kids into what was being said the 8 year old has a happy worried book all the happy things are about her mom and all the so called nightmares are about me. So the judge ordered a psychological report be done on all the case files and police interviews and her book . It has come back and says it looks like the mother has not couched her she is not making it up because it was to spontaneous and her story has never changed and if I was a lie why would the mother or child make such a complex story up. And he says in his view there is pretty good support for the credibility of 8 year old in respect of the allegations of her abuse against her So they are trying to say I'm guilty I DID NOT DO IT Help we are back in court soon finding of fact on sexual assault if I'm found guilty I will never see my kids this is what the judge said more

Resolved Question: EX wife accusing me of sexual assault need help?

Resolved Question: Haiti - American Church Members, Saviours or Child Abductors?

The news has just broken that many of the 'orphans' which were 'rescued' by members of the arrested American based, Meridian, Idaho, Church were in fact not orphans at all and have families alive and well and living in Haiti. The arrests had echoes of those of workers from a French religious charity who were arrested in Chad, in November of 2007. and subsequently convicted of kidnap. The arrests which were made as church members allegedly attempted to cross the Haitian border with the children who, it would seem, had with them no passports or documentation of any kind, a fact in itself which would have made repatriation of the children at a later date, as it was claimed was the intention, extremely difficult if not downright impossible. At the time of the arrests there was a great deal of anger in the U.S. and elsewhere in the West I'm sure, at what was widely regarded as poor helpless orphans being denied a better life in the U.S.A. Surely, if these people wanted to help the children then they should have offered help and support in Haiti. There seems to exist an arrogance particularly amongst some Americans but by no means exclusively so, about what is best for the poor of the Third World and in particular their children, which seems to be predicated on material wealth and right-wing Christian morals. These attitudes are uncomfortably reminiscent of those which prevailed in Great Britain in the late nineteenth century at a time when Christian missionaries travelled to remote parts of the British Empire to bring God and civilisation to the 'heathen savages'. More recently we witnessed, in Australia, Aboriginal children stripped from their families to be given a 'better life' with white families or in care homes, and more recently still, poor often slum dwelling English children around the time of WWII 'transported' to live with Australian families under the guise of war evacuation, but in fact this was done to bolster and add new blood to the Australian population. Sadly, many of both the Aboriginal and British children finished up physically and/or sexually abused. In very recent times we have seen film stars and wealthy celebrities such as the singer Madonna causing a great deal of controversy when they have bought their most recent little black, brown or yellow baby. In the case of Madonna, her P.R. machine tried to counter the negative comments, which abounded at the time, by pointing to the financial advantages that this 'lucky child', Baby David, would win by becoming part of his new dysfunctional family. Who the hell are we to make value judgements about the quality of life of others? I wonder what would be the attitude of the many Americans if wealthy Europeans or God forbid Africans or Asians were caught trying to smuggle poor children from the projects and trailer parks of the U.S.A. to give them a better life in their countries? - Actually no don't answer that one, but I'm sure you see the point that I am trying to make. Now I am not suggesting for one moment that true orphans who are in need of adoption should not be relocated abroad but these decisions should be made by the proper agencies, for proper reasons and following proper procedures which have built into them safeguards to protect the interests of the child and not by some rag tag bunch of religious missionaries who imagine themselves to be on a quest from their god or, worse, adventurers who see the children as a commodity which can carry a bounty of upwards of $10,000 per head. Saviours or Child Abductors, You decide?Thanks to all who’ve joined this debate so far, it is a relief to note that most of you pretty much agree with my point of view maybe I should try to answer one or two of you who didn't. * Docker - You completely missed the point I was trying to make - who decides what is 'better off'? * $$$ - Oh my! This sounds like a case of sour grapes, are you sure that you are getting enough? * Sophie, what venom! - I wondered at first whether you had accidentally attached your answer to the wrong question. I never mentioned 'conservatives' also I was not aware that I had expressed any hate or bigotry. I am assuming that you harbour these feelings because I have mentioned Americans. I certainly had no intention of trying to denigrate or cause any offence to my Colonial cousins but unfortunately, in this case at least, the child snatchers were American and so this would automatically apply an American spin and any reference to arrogance was meant to apply to all of us in the developed world. more

Resolved Question: Why are conservatives always on the wrong side of morality?

Conservatives tend to be very inconsistent on their views. For example, they're generally against abortion. Assuming that abortion really is murder as they claim (please dont argue about whether abortion is right or wrong, that's not the issue here), it seems to be one of the few issues that they are against on "moral grounds" that have a legitimate base (for example, the act of murder is immoral, so if you believe that abortion is murder and you disagree with it on the basis that makes sense, but other "moral issues" aren't universally immoral, ie gay marriage). However, conservatives tend to have a social darwinist ideology and think the "weaker" should die off. Wouldn't it be logical then for woman on welfare to have an abortion to prevent generations of abusing the system ? The fact that they are against abortion and protest the horror of it, but rarely consider the effects of it on the children doesnt make sense. Clearly its not an issue of morality, but an issue of control otherwise they would support welfare programs for children in poverty. Their disgust of abortion is way to legitimize their desire to control. Surely one is not an champion of morality if their consideration of morality is limited to one issue and they haven't the compassion to think of the effects of said issue! To them they think that abortion is wrong, and then want to penalize the kids that they would have wanted the woman to be forced to have by limiting welfare programs. Regardless of your opinion of welfare, you cant seriously force a woman to have a kid when she doesnt have the financial necessities to take care of the kid and expect her to do so! Do you really think the kid should be forced to live in poverty because at least he's alive? Please dont call yourself champions of morality if you so readily support war. Regardless of your justification for the current wars in Iraq and Afghanistan (which of course arent justified), you rarely protest or otherwise show disgust for what you consider "collateral damage". You say callous things like "it is necessary". (I suppose its necessary for terrorists (the US army) to invade a country for strategic reasons and kill whoever gets in their way) Why are conservatives always on the wrong side of morality?Modern Mountain Man, I agree that morality is subjective, but I'm simply questioning their inconsistent views. This is mainly a response to them (social conservatives) considering themselves "moral champions". And murder tends to be looked down upon. more

Resolved Question: what to do about my neighbours constant complaints about me to our landlord?

They have reported me to our landlord stating I allow my son to scream, shout and bang around all day long, that I have constant parties through out the day and night, and that I am always shouting and arguing out front at night. i don't do any of these things. they have now complained to the landlord 6 times this month. I have had all the floors sound proofed at my own expensive when I first moved in because i am aware children do tend to make a bit of noise playing. But the way they are going on you would think I have bare floors, and apparently this banging through out the day causes there lights to flicker and they are unable to hear there tv. The thing is my son is in full time nursery and I work full time from my mum's house. We are out the door every day mon - fri at 8:30am and don't get back till around 6:30 - 7:00 depending on what time the carer shows up to take over in regards to caring for my mum. My son is in bed dead on 8:30 every night. On the weekends I am at my mothers caring for her as she is terminally ill and I'm her sole carer. Her carer only stays from 6am to 3pm so I go straight to my mums after picking up my son from nursery until her carer shows up. I don't like her being on her own. What can I do to get my neighbours off my back? I have had a lot of issues with them in the past. In fact a number of our neighbours have, especially my neighbour to the right. I don't need the added stress. I've had police turn up at my door saying they have received reports that I am dealing drugs from my home, I've had a housing officer show up to look into the reports of these "constant" parties which every time have turned out to be false allegations. I have had social services show up on 3 separate occasions stating that reports have been that I was "seen" abusing my son out from the building on a day to day basis. Also these allegations where proved false. I have now had a letter through the door stating my neighbours are going to start court proceedings to have me evicted if the problems persist. I'm at a lose as to what I can do? I have looked into moving but with my mum being sick it's not an option. Any ideas? This all started when I knocked one day to ask them to turn down the music as it was the early hours of the morning and I had work and my son had nursery in a few hours. Ever since then the female especially has made things very difficult for me. more

Resolved Question: Why do many (not all) women in religions allow themselves to be abused and mistreated?

I have an aunt who is a devout Christian, She is married to a man that beats her and treats her like crap. One example, she was recently very sick and had to take time off work. They have three kids, the youngest is nine and still needs some help with things. He would not even help her with the kid even though his job let him have time off. He spent it drinking beer and watching sports, while my aunt had to take the child to and from school and prepare all meals. He had a stroke a few years back, and she however, was right by his side night and day. Confuses me, such self-hate. I believe there is a well-defined line between goodness and sacrifice, and stupidity. She stays because she doesn't "believe in divorce." He has given her gonorrhea twice. One only has to look around and read the koran, bible and other religious books to see examples in the texts themselves. In the koran, 4:34 (al-nisa, the women) beating a woman for not doing what a man wants is acceptable in Islam. Slave women (for sex) are acceptable in the bible, torah and koran alike, with no amendments "for today". LDS women are treated like holy hos and the old man is a holy pimp. Why is there so much woman hate? I do not discount or pretend to be ignorant to the fact that people are people, and people have personalities and individual mindsets, and all can't be blamed on religions. However, the writings are there advising men to treat women like second class citizens and women gobble up the programming as well. How can a woman accept these things? To you who are in it: Do you love yourselves at all?Fascinating PakistaniKarnage. You have chose to post the fluff of the koran, while being oblivious to the things written in book 4 (al-nisa) regarding women. Denying a fact does not make the fact less substantial.Equally fascinating that so many muslims are drawn to questions like mine, even when no one is addressing islam specifically. Why do you feel you must defend your religion so hard if it has done nothing wrong? Let it speak for itself.Snoopyyy...I'm so sorry. I am glad you have a good man by your side though. I wish you and your family the best. more

Resolved Question: Is this a form of bullying?

Here are the details: A relationship between my ex and I didnt work out. He left me during my 6th month of pregnancy. We agreed to stick together through it with support etc and that he would support me through at least until a few months after the child is born since I am far from my family and don't have a strong support network here. We agreed not to sleep with or date other people during this process. He called me and told me that he started to date someone else and that he moved on. THis was about 1 week after the agreement.. only about 3 weeks after we last had intercourse. I became very upset and posted that I am upset on my facebook status. Someone replied asking me what is wrong. I replied that I am upset because the father of my child has started dating someone else. No one else knows of the agreement he broke. Of course a lot of people replied that he is immature, irresponsible etc. He told me to remove the status because it is 'embarrassing' and I told him that I have nothing to be embarrassed about as this is the truth. He may have just said this to me to intentionally hurt my feelings, which I concider to be mental abuse. However, is the fact that I posted this a form of bullying? http://teenadvice.about.com/od/violencebullying/a/girlbullies.htm more

Resolved Question: Should I contact CPS on my brothers fiance? Will he also be held accountable?

For a while now I have been contemplating contacting CPS about my 2 yr old nephew. I have seen bruises on his body, a year ago there was a burn mark on his neck which his mother stated a hot french fry from McDonald's did it, and recently I have noticed when he farts or goes "# 2", he looks fearful as though what he did was a bad thing and he was afraid that he would be punished for doing so. Through the grapevine I have also heard that his 7 yr old sister (not my brothers child), has mentioned that their mother does hit him, and when she tried to get her to stop, she yells at her. My brother works full time, sometimes 12 hour shifts, so he isn't' able to see all that goes on while he isn't home and I know that he would never lay a hand on his child, in fact, he rarely disciplines him at all. If I contact CPS would my brother be held accountable too? My brother loves his son but I think he fears her too and worries what might happen if he did try to leave. She did not have a very nice childhood so I can see where her anger came from, but abusing a 2 yr old is inexcusable, she's just repeating the cycle. I know my brother needs to step in, but like I said, I think he's fearful of her too. Any suggestions? more