Welcome to Abuse

The Child Abuse Picture Page

Welcome to our site where we have collected recent news and resources for Child Abuse Picture.

Latest Child Abuse Picture News

Child sexual abuse by clergy a small part of a very big ... - Cape Breton

The Diocese of Antigonish struggles with childhood sexual abuse. In the big picture, this is a pervasive, worldwide problem that includes child sex trade and pornography. Better choices and outcomes exist for the parishioners, for the survivors, and ...

Child’s church picture of stirs Lenteen passions - msnbc.com

DALLAS - Some find Jackson Potts II's photograph of a nightstick-wielding policeman beating a fallen, bleeding child violent and offensive, conjuring images of police brutality and child abuse. But to Jackson, a talented 10-year-old Houston ...

CBS's Pizzey: Child Sex Abuse 'A Plague of Biblical ... - News Busters

On Friday's CBS Early Show correspondent Allen Pizzey made the over-the-top declaration that allegations of child sexual abuse within the Catholic ... of the Devil at work in the Vatican," with a link to a picture of Pope. In response to another ...

Anti-Smoking Campaign in Moscow Promotes Child Abuse - Pravda

... norms and promoted abuse of children. The infamous billboards appeared in Moscow in March. They depict a sleeping baby with a cigarette butt put down against her back. The slogan on the billboard says: “Smoking in child ... the picture shows.

Sex abuse victim: 'I am a survivor' - Wichita Eagle

As a child, Tally suffered sexual abuse for years. A camera -- which spit out instant images of her in sexual poses -- became ... Beneath each picture, Anderson — who is being considered for parole — would write a caption with the date it was ...

Church has lost moral authority - Sydney Morning Herald

After allegations of child abuse, the entire order ... more lurid headlines as they expose further the scale and detail of the abuse. The church's loss of moral authority is only a part of a bigger picture. Financial ruin provoked by compensation ...

German bishop surprised at number of abuse cases - Kansas City Star

FILE - In this Sept. 13, 2006 file picture Pope Benedict XVI, right, walks with his ... Catholic colleagues in Ireland must tell "the entire truth" about their decades of covering up child abuse in the priesthood - or else the Irish government may ...

Maryland Man Pleads Guilty to Transportation of Child ... - American Chronicle

... noticed a posting by Walker on Craigslist, which indicated Walker´s desire to have sexual contact with "a young girl or young boy" and included a picture of ... the growing epidemic of child sexual exploitation and abuse launched in May 2006 by ...

The dark forest of childhood - Boston Globe

This idea was upsetting to me not just as a mother, but as an author, too, because I write fiction for exactly this age group — girls too old for picture books but not ... the long, fine tradition of the carefree child was ending. Until a few days ...

Danish rights group urges Catholic secrecy review - Presstv

Bishop Czeslaw Kozon (seen in this undated picture) has been criticized for saying that ... Children has reportedly urged the reappraisal of secrecy clauses to ensure that alleged cases of child abuse are investigated. The move comes after ...

Open Question: Does anybody know what movie this is ?

Okay,so I was talking with my mom about a movie I remembered watching with her five plus years ago,and she has no clue what I'm talking about . I can't remember the name of it .. what do you think it might be ? no,just kidding . It had a little girl named something to shorten to Cat/Kat and she was adopted or something like that . And she was maybe about 4-6 and he brother was a bit younger,but old enough to walk and talk,maybe 3ish . I believe I remember her beating him in the basement or something like that . I remember the mother talking to somebody about the children were abused at their old home and that that the little boy was left laying in his crib for so long that the back of his head was flat . The girl used to draw pictures of houses burning and things like that . If you have any idea to what this movie is called,that would be great . Thanks a lot . more

Open Question: Please help with this movie ?

Resolved Question: Can someone help me about losing my virginity?

Okay i am 35 years old and i have never lost my virginity, the reason is as a child i was abused and raped by my older brothers, when i was 15 my penius was 4.5 inches, but after years of watching porn and jerking off it is now 2.0 when erect, what should i do to lose my virginity here is my picture: http://media.photobucket.com/image/old%20guy/ekp08_2010/SuperKeithMexicoRetirement2010/Mexico2010-LF1002.jpg?o=5 more

Open Question: Abused by husband, taking anger out on kid?

Do women who are abused by their husbands take anger towards the man out on children? here is the story.. a woman gets pregnant to a man thats abusing her (hitting, sexually etc) they have the kid, at 2 yrs of age the man sexually abuses the boy and continues abusing the mother. she leaves him finally. a new man steps into the picture, they have a new baby together. the first son is shunned, neglected, treated like less of an equal than the second boy born to the new dad. when the boy has grown up and has a family of his own (a baby also) his mother disowns them because of a "quarrel" the two brothers have. the mother has always sided with the younger brother even if he is the one who is wrong. in an email, the mother said to her son "ok (the abusive mans name), thats enough!" she called her son by the fathers name, as if she is treating him as the abuser. is she taking her anger towards that man out on her son after all these years??? more

Open Question: my husbands ex girlfriend is crazy, but they have a son.?

ok so back story, they were together 4 months. she got pregnant, he found out she cheated on him 3 times and left. he met me. We was together for 2 years i got pregnant with our daughter and we got married. But every since their son was born she has been coming at him non-stop. he pays child support but cant see him because she took him to court because he wouldn't go to her house at 9pm on friday nights alone like she wanted. the court wouldn't let him see him in a neutral place on days off. she doesn't work and spends all her time on myspace harassing my husband. he says he wants to see his son, it really bothers him. She even sends him pictures where you see her face and everything and shes holding their son, his face away from the camera saying things like my son is so beautiful but you'll never see him. then is saying out of the kindness of her heart will let him see the baby under her conditions. Shes wacko, what can we do? we cant afford a lawyer. and how do i deal with all this? it hurts me to! oh and he was adopted. his dad was a very abusive man and on myspace she writes all about the abuse he went through how he was adopted, and gave his full name out to everyone. she has wrote blogs about my daughter and me. more

Open Question: okay, what do I do about her, I really think she may be depressed or something?

I'm new to this, My fiance goes on here all the time and loves it so i figured i would try it out. My fiance lived a shitty childhood, She was abused by her father who constantly beat her, she was the youngest of 8 children and has been told mailtlable times that she was not wanted and if her grandmother hadn't told her mom that she had to keep her she would have aborted her. Lately she had been pushing me away, snapping at everything and i got the hint she was trying to make me leave her. I finally got her to talk last night and now i'm concerned, she told me I'm not suppose to love her because she doesn't deserve to be loved. she is not good enough enough, and she is scared because she doesn't know how to love ( we have two children one is my step son but i consider him my son, and she is such an amazing mother you can see how much she loves her children) i told her she does a great job at loving me and our children. she started crying and i guess not asking me directly but asking why she couldn't be loved why her dad beat her and her mom didn't want her, her mom did leave her dad and she had an amazing step dad, who was the only parent in her life, her mom just didn't care what she did she was 11 and hanging out with 20 year olds, she has been raped twice, and both times was told to push the pain to ignore it, she wasn't allowed to show emotion or tell people she was upset or hurting. her step dad was the one who cared but her mom would fight him on it. I'm sure her mom did love her but didn't know how to express it because she had been married to such an abusive man and grew up abused. however now my fiance is feeling as if she shouldn't be loved that she doesn't deserve to be loved and she is scared because we have such an amazing relationship we are getting married in 6 months. I'm concerned that her child hood really messed her up. her sons father was abusive and that's why she left, however she wouldn't have left if i didn't come into the picture. I grew up much different my parents are still married after 35 years, are happy, and yes we had our problems as child but we were always showed love im very affectionate. i just don't know how to help her, she has been to counsellors and always says talking doesn't help take her pain away. I'm so lost as to what to, like i said she is a great mother a wonderful women but i don't know how to help her with what happened to her. And last night really made me think, the only person that showed her love passed away and i think its really just starting to hit her now. Anyone please direct me on how i can help her. sorry this is so long! more

Voting Question: Reported child abuse towards my 1 year old daughter...whats next?

I'm from Minnesota and we live on a reservation. I have 2 children my youngest has a different father. She's 15 months old. On occasion her grandmother will come get her for a week at a time to spend time with their family. Sometimes its only a few days. But at least she still gets to see them. I called them up on March 2nd and asked if they would take her for 2 days as i was going out of town. Wednesday to Friday. I offered to drop her off and pick her back up myself. They agreed so as i was getting ready to head out of town her grandma showed up at my house and just picked her up herself. I was ok with that because that just took a half hour out of hour drive. So upon leaving I told her grandma that I would be at their house Friday evening to pick her back up. She said her dad wanted to keep her until Monday. I was fine with that being that they never really get to see her in the first place. And she then said she'd just drop her back off at our place. So I got back into town and Monday came. My daughter still wasnt home. No phone call nothing. At this time I wasn't able to reach any of them so i emailed my daughters aunt on the 8th and asked her when they were going to bring my daughter back. She responded with they'll bring her back in a couple days. Couple of days later on the 11th I emailed her again and asked her when they were gonna bring her back. She then responded on the 12th with "I dont know when they plan on bring her back". So Sunday night (14th) came and I finally had enough and tracked down one of their cell phone #'s called them up and finally got a hold of them. They brought her back the next day which was the 15th. The last time they brought her back to me she had lice...so my first instinct was to check her head. Sure enough she had it!! A little later on I changed her diaper and i noticed a dark spot on her left thigh. So I turned on all of the lights so i could see better and sure enough there lay a very distinct hand print surrounded by other bruises. The next morning i called up to our human services department and they told me since her father was enrolled on the reservation that we lived on we had to speak to indian child welfare and report the abuse with them. So i did. They intake worker filled out the report with me over the phone and asked me to email her the pictures i had taken of her leg. After that she told me if she had any other questions that she would contact me. And then the county human service department called me and asked me to see the pictures also. So i think they both have to be involved because my daughter and myself are not enrolled on this reservation. i dont know I just want whoever did this to my daughter to pay for it and never be allowed to see her again. Really WHO does this to a child?? Ever since i filed the complaint her family has been calling my house phone trying to speak to me. I dont wish to speak to them so i just ignore the call. I have no idea whats going to happen next but does anyone else have a clue what would happen?? more

Resolved Question: Difficulty with my mother (i am an adult)?

First of all, I love my mom and would like nothing more than to ignore this problem, but it's impossible. Picture the show Animal cops, the ones with the dog hoarders and the feces and urine and junk everywhere. well, that plus an inch or two of excrement is my mom with the added bonus of roaches and mice. she was that way for years, then about a year ago, she decided to buy a new home, and promised it would remain dog free. the only issue then was her husband's chain smoking and the yellow tar all over the house, but at least we could visit for a little while and he could just leave the room to smoke. anyway, i recently had my second son, and my 4 year old had to stay with my mom while i was in the hospital due to some major complications. although she'd brought a couple toy sized dogs into the house, when i'd been there personally, it was reasonably clean. (clutter, but no excrement) my son came home with strange red bites all over him, and i began to get concerned. well, i recently took a trip with my mom and had to spend the night with her the night prior to leaving. she picked me up from my house (4 hours from hers) along with my 2 kids and we went to hers. when i walked in i was shocked to find a fresh layer of poo and pee on top of a few old layers. if i had a way to leave, i would have left immediately (my husband had our truck for a business trip and our second car is being repaired, or i would have had a way to drive myself.) i just took my infant son and my 4 year old into our room (which luckily was dog free) and made the best of the few hours we had to stay. my mother suffers from several problems, including depression and ptsd from a very abusive childhood. she loves my sons and would do nothing to hurt them, but the few times my four year old has stayed in her new home (before it was pooped all over) i had relatives who live near make sure they checked in to make sure it wasn't too overwhelming for her. here is my question/issue. i know she has a problem. i understand having an abusive childhood (she left me with my father and i suffered abuse like she did.) i understand being overwhelmed, but my take on it is that you can't allow it to ruin the rest of your life. she still plays the victim card daily and uses it as an excuse to validate her filth. everytime she talks to me about it, i want to tell her to get over it because i know it's possible to. i did. she threw me to the wolves as a child and i forgave her, moved on and i now have a beautiful family and a fairly good relationship with her. i don't hold it against her and don't use my past to excuse mistreating myself of my children. so i know she has a choice. what would you say to her? she loves my kids but i can't allow them to go to her home because it has become unsafe again. the only reason i let the older one visit her overnight is because i wanted to encourage her for putting out such a huge effort so that he could visit. my husband is fed up and said they are never allowed in her home no matter what because we found out that the red marks on my son were roach bites and she failed to warn me when i was bringing my infant son over that there would be such a mess again. anyway, i am just grasping at any hope i have of keeping a relationship with her, but it's hard to hear her talk about how we should all understand and pity her pain when she put me in a similar and in some ways more severe situation growing up, then expects me to send my children to what is basically a toilet. (not to mention the poor dogs who also have to live there) i don't think i am better than she is, i am a clutter bug myself. i deal with depression about my own issues. i have irrational feelings sometimes, difficulty dealing with things...but i recognize when my feelings aren't logical, and even if i get a little blue sometimes, i take care of my children. she doesn't feel that i have any problems because she wasn't my abuser and wasn't there to see any of it first hand..so she doesn't listen when i tell her i know how she feels. more

Resolved Question: I need advice to protect my daughter please.?

Ok during the course of our marriage there was alot of physical and mental abuse. Enough to the point where i actually got on meds for bi-polor disorder because i thought is was all my fault ( i had never had a history of mental illness before) I hated myself and i was convinced everything that happened was all my fault. In the end the meds never helped they made me such a zombie that it took everything i had just to peel myself up off the couch to use the restroom it was misrable. I finally realized after almost 2 years it wasnt me when we moved in with family because my husband discharged from the military and they began to see the abuse and worry for me. Asking if i really needed the meds and maybe with support i should see if i could function better without the meds. So after talking to my Dr. i began to ween off the meds. After being 5 weeks off me meds i felt wonderful. i was loosing weight and taking care of myself and my children again. I told my husband he was furious that i had made this choice without him and the first chance he got when no one was home but us he had me pinned to the kitchen floor by my hair. Pining me and yelling about a pile of laundry i hadnt washed. Something so simple, had he just asked i would have told him it was whites and there wasnt enough for a full load yet lol. Anyway I decided this was the last straw and i waited for him to go to work the next day and called him and told him he was not welcome back at the house. I have a 2 year old daughter. I have had black eyes, i have scars on my wrist from him sqeezing them so tight it left something i could best discribe as rug burn but without any rug envolved. I even cut like 14 inches off my hair at one point to try to advoid being pulled around by it. None of that hurt as much as the mental pain of thinkiing it was my fault and i was useless and worthless and i was an embarrisment if i could just be better he would stop being mean....it was always my fault. I have a baby girl that i feel like i cant protect now. Never once was i intelligent enough to just call the police. Other then a few scars and a couple pictures there is no proof any of this went on and no one seems to be listening to me. My lawyer keeps wanting me to comprmise with parenting time in order to get other things such as permission to take vacation. And i'm sorry i would rather loose money on my palne tickets then give parenting time to this man. I keep being told that in the end he will get parenting time no matter what and i should just give in a little bit right now. We have a 2 year old daughter who is totally innocent in all of this. I feel so bad for her and what she is going to have to go thru in the future. Im so afraid he is going to treat her the way he treated me and she is to little to tell me or tell anyone. 3 months ago i let him have parenting time and she came home with a black eye and he told me she feel ( 2 year olds do fall i understand that) but the visitation after that she sreamed and cried and reached for me saying no mommy no!!! and it broke my heart. So since there is no court order i have not made her go back since. I dont know what to do i recommened supervised visitation and i keep being told with no police record of the abuse i'll never get that and i'm being unreasonable. Its so frustrating and i'm at a loss now. I knwo he's mean and hateful and capable of being extrememly abbusive but everyone around me seems to see him and this honeralable purple heart vetran that fought for our counrty over in Iraq. I have all the respect in the worlld for the men and women overseas and i believe they work hard and are wonderful people for doing what they do. But just because he did these great things for the country doesnt mean he didnt do these things to me. How do i get people to see that this is my daughters safety???? Does anyone have any advice?????Abusive Ex and i'm being told i have no chance at getting full custody of my daughterJust to make it clear i have already left i cant wait for it to happen again and then call the police. I'm out of the situation and it wont happen again i'm just trying to fight for my daughter now. more

Resolved Question: Is it better to just call CPS or wait to build up evidence and go back to court?

My husband is trying to get custody of his daughter. We've been documenting everything that happens and taking pictures of the child's shabby appearance everytime she comes over. She is always dirty and has rashed on her area. She doesn't eat well and has poor oral hygiene. She is generally sick as well. She is told that her father is not her real father and doesn't love her. She is told to tell her mom everything that happens so that her mom can go back to court. I read the guidelines of mental abuse and neglect on the CPS website and this child fits about 60 to 70% of the examples. We don't think that CPS will do much, though. The organization is pretty worthless here. We don't want them to ignore us and damage our credibility, but we also don't want them to put the mother on her guard so that she can put on a nice face until she's out of the spotlight. She isn't going to change. Would it be better to build up all the evidence of neglect (as well as other harmful things) and go to court here in about a year (we have to wait until our next tax return so that we can afford an attorney and build a proper case) or should we just call CPS until they do something? The goal here is to give the child a stable home. She won't get that with her mom. If we jump the gun it will take longer for my husband to get custody because he won't have enough evidence. He nor I want to put his little girl through any more than we have to so we don't want to go back to court until we're sure that we can do it quickly (i.e. building up a strong case) more

Resolved Question: Is it better to call CPS or build up evidence to go back to court?

Resolved Question: What is wrong with parents these days?

Inspired by an experience I had with the police and child abuse charges made against my dad when I was in the 7th grade, I posted 2 separate questions on here earlier. The first was titled "My dad BEAT me with a belt b/c I had sex" and spoke about how I only did it b/c I didn't feel loved. The second was titled "My dad SPANKED me with a belt because he found a condom in my room" and spoke about how I was a virgin and only had the condom b/c they gave us them in a class at school. BOTH questions said "I have huge welts all over my legs, it hurts so bad, what can I do?" A good 80-90% of the responses on the question about getting belted for having sex told me to take pictures of the welts and report him to the police b/c he had no right to abuse me for making a mistake. Almost 100% of the responses on the one about being belted for having a condom, however, read something similar to "He just did it because he loves you and you're his little girl, sweetie. Go put some ice on the welts and then give him a hug for caring to discipline you." I'm still trying to figure out WHAT those answerers thought I was being disciplined for...showing up to class and not skipping? The question clearly stated that the asker have no intentions of using the condom and received it from a school teacher. So basically, it's abuse to belt your child for having sex but it's "caring" to belt her for having an unopened condom. In both cases, "huge welts" were mentioned. The difference was I used the word "beat" in the 1st question and the word "spank" in the 2nd. My results scare me. That's exactly how my dad got out of jail 7 years ago...told police he 'spanked' my siblings and I, and that led to visible marks (and in some cases bruises) being ignored. How can this phenomenon be explained? more

Resolved Question: my little spanking experiment on you all?

A bit earlier, and just now, I posted 2 separate questions. The first one was titled something like "My dad BEAT me with a belt b/c I had sex" the second one was "My dad SPANKED me with a belt because he found a condom in my room." and it talked about how my school gave me it for free and I didn't use it. BOTH questions said "I have huge welts all over my legs, it hurts so bad, what can I do?" BUT interestingly, for the first question, people were seriously hysterical like "omgosh hunny, call the cops NOW before this gets any worse; he has no right to abuse you because you made a mistake, take pictures of the welts for social services, are you okay?!!" and the second question, 90% of my responses were like "he's just protecting you because you're his little girl, sweetie. you should thank him because he cares about you. put ice on the welts and then give him a hug for disciplining you" So the difference was between using the word "beat" and "spank." In both instances, "huge welt marks" were mentioned, but people found that acceptable in the case of the 2nd question. even though, in the 1st one i actually had sex...the 2nd one all i had was an unopened condom received in a sex ed class. So be careful of this kinda thing; it's how child abusers get away with beating their children...I've witnessed it in real life. They tell authorities, "I was just just spanking him/her!" and suddenly it's okay..even if in reality the child was left with marks that lasted hours or days. Thought it might be unethical to not let yall know the questions were just experimental. :) more

Resolved Question: get over my cousins murder? <L0NG>?

before i ask my question, i would like to give some detail. january 18th, 2003, a beautiful babyboy christopher was born. it was my cousin "alans" baby. him & christophers mother, heather, had been together for well over 3 years by this time & we all thought they would one day get married. but we was wrong. they decided to end it. alan stayed a part in christophers life. august of 2004 he got put in states custody for not going to school? stupid i know. anyways at that time heather was in another relationship with another man. shaun mullins. soon after alan got locked up heather rufused to let me or the rest of the family see chris. we finally got to see him in december for christmas. at this time alan had gotten out of lock up. chris came to our family get together & he had bruises all over him. from the top of his head to the bottom of this feet. cigarette burns on the soles of his feet. bruises in his ears. & he had lost so much weight, you could literally see every bone in his body. when heather came back to get him, alan asked her what had happened & she said that he got into a fight at daycare & a boy pushed him off of the swingset. we knew exactly what had happened. after this we contacted the police, department of human services & child abuse hotlines. nothing seemed to help. we saw him for the last time the weekend before easter, 2005. he still looked the same, if not worse. we then took pictures of him & took them to the police. we finally got them to go check the welfare of chris. they had set up a date [april 1, 2005] for heather & shaun to speak with them about what was going on with chris & why he had so many brusies. but on the night of march 30th, 2005 we had a police office arrive at our doorstep with the news that tore our hearts right out of our chest. chris was in the hospital suffering from cardiac arrest. we rushed to the hospital, but by the time we got there it was too late. he went to be with the lord. i still seem to think that if only i would have done a little bit more then maybe he would still be here with us today. i think about him constantly. but i know hes in a better place where he doesnt have to suffer anymore. so my question is, do you think that maybe some of this was my fault? that maybe if i would have tried a little bit more i would have possibly saved him? here is a picture of christopher while he was still happy ): http://i933.photobucket.com/albums/ad175… and btw, if your up to reading this newspaper articale, this is what happened to the guy that abused him & took away his life. & they just arrested his mother, heather, for the exact same charges. A Kingsport man who potentially faced the death penalty if found guilty of killing his girlfriend’s toddler son has agreed to a last-minute plea deal.Shawn Anthony Mullins, 27, was headed to trial Monday morning on charges of first-..degree.. felony murder and aggravated child abuse and neglect stemming from the 2005 death of 2-year-old Christopher David Smith by means of severe physical abuse.Mullins was 22 on March 30, 2005, when Heather Collins found her 2-year-old son unresponsive at a friend’s home on Robin Lane where the couple had been staying.At the time, Mullins had been left alone with the boy for about two hours, according to investigators.Christopher reportedly was suffering from cardiac arrest and was rushed to a local hospital, where he later died.Prior to Christopher’s death, Mullins and Collins had been scheduled to meet with a Department of Children’s Services worker on April 2, 2005, to discuss allegations of child abuse. Those complaints were filed with the Kingsport Police Department in February and March of that year by family of the boy’s father.Sullivan County Sheriff’s Office Detective Lt. Bobby Russell told the Times-News in 2005 that the boy had been beaten repeatedly, suffering multiple broken bones and bruises that were in various stages of healing.On Monday, Sullivan County Assistant District ..Attorney.. Barry Staubus advised the judge if the case had gone to trial, the evidence would show the boy suffered injuries to his heart, kidney and brain in addition to a broken arm and leg.Staubus said testimony would have shown evidence that Mullins was jealous of the boy.According to court records, when the boy cried Mullins would say he “‘wished the little (expletive) would die” and cover his mouth in an attempt to make him stop.Mullins was accused of picking Christopher up by his head; throwing him into his crib; striking him with his fist, palm and the back of his hand; kicking him in the back and knocking him to the ground; and placing a bucket over his head and striking the bucket as the boy walked around, according to court documents.Additionally, Mullins was accused of forcing Christopher to inhale marijuana smoke and consume alcohol, according to court documents.A report prosecutors received Thursday from one of their own expert witnesses “changed the evidence that would be prese more

Resolved Question: Need advice (Long story) please? :/?

I have kind of a long story. I don’t know where on the internet I can just write and have people voice their opinions so I chose to write this here. To help paint a picture of myself: I’m a 20 year old guy in college. I’m pretty cute (around an 8), and funny. I work with computers for my major but I’m not as nerdy as my peers as I like to party and hang out with girls. Growing up I was the sole person between life and death for troubled girls. I’ve seen them drenched in blood head to toe from slashing and bruised due to child abuse. It made me appreciate life to be able to help them; and they really needed somebody to be nice and generous with the time I devoted to the friendships. That started for me at 8 years old. Not the typical childhood. My now-adult version of this child became me researching unthought-of ways to cure cancer (which I had to discontinue due to my severe depression making me highly unmotivated). Back in high school, I wasn’t very popular or good-looking. I was probably a 4. Those things made me excited to come to college and start over and meet new people or actually have friends to hang out with on the weekend. I met some friends my Freshman year at parties through my best friend who’s a girl that I worked up my friendship with in high school. That was great and all, but then the following summer made me realize how alone I was again because back home none of my new friends lived near me so we didn’t get to visit really. This year I tried hanging out with the same people, but every time there is drama. Slowly everybody started leaving, one by one. For example, one girl stopped being our friends because she spread BS about everyone. The “leader” of our friends was really bitchy and was upset at me for having sex with my best friend from high school who thought I was using her (without actually talking to me about it.) So I lost my best friend from high school/FWB of over a year. I also lost my new friend from Freshman year because she was mad about how she thought I was playing my best friend. Then of course nobody can keep things private so the whole group is now talking about how big of a jerk I am for something I didn’t even do; and without even talking to me. For about 2 months they did this; I wasn’t invited to hang out with them anymore. Now, we sort of worked things out. I’m a low key guy and don’t cause drama so this is weird for me; they’re all mad for a private relationship of mine without even hearing my side of the story! However, they treat me like nothing’s wrong for the most part I guess. Still, I hear things like how this “badass guy” (as the girls call him; he’s really a douchey drugdealer.) in the group acts nice to me like we’re great buds then when I leave he laughs at how he lies to me and says shit about me. My best friend (girl, not FWB) of THIS year that I had been talking to, telling her things such as this message I’m writing now but I found out she repeats these things to anybody else. She also puts me on speakerphone when I call her with them... If she even answers my phone. I made out with this girl last year though but it was just a fling. She said she just wants a real relationship now so she doesn’t do that... Yet I found out she had been making out with the drugdealer guy when she was drunk even though she constantly tells me how much she hates him; he is creepy to her and even put her on some sort of hit list. She never makes out with me like she used to, even when she’s drunk like she did last year, and furthermore you don’t make out with somebody you hate. I talked to her about this and she didn’t understand why it was a big deal. Not that I really care to make out with her anymore, but by choosing him over me means she thinks he is better than me. I clearly can’t trust any of my friends; none of them can keep secrets. I lose my best friends every year (I don’t even talk to my girl from last year) so I’ve never known anybody really well for over a year. I can’t get to know anybody well either if they constantly betray my trust like this, and do things to piss me off (such as they constantly ditch me with NO warning because they “forgot” we had plans or something important came up, leaving me waiting for up to 8 hours). I have nobody to hang out with on the weekends, nobody to talk to or listen to. I try to meet new people but it’s creepy doing that as a lone-guy. I’ve told these people how serious it is and how much they mean to me and they sincrely say the same thing back to me. Then I tell them how important it is that they treat me better and they say they will but never do. I’ve even had nights where I honestly tell them I was feeling legit suicidal (I’m the funny guy; I don’t really say stuff like that ever) and how I really need somebody around to make sure I’m alright, or even to talk to and even then they brush it off like it’s no big deal. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m getting really tired of trying to mee more

Resolved Question: Why do abused children feel it is their fault?

I'm doing a project for an english class, and I'm making a creative cover. I drew a child sitting in a corner crying and was going to write some of the things that an abuser would say to make the child feel like they deserved it or that it was their fault. Any suggestions on what I should write around the picture?Here's what the picture looks like. http://i151.photobucket.com/albums/s146/lilemeril247/corner4.jpg Oh, and thank you Meh! more

Resolved Question: daydreaming everyday getting obsessed can't stop?

i'm daydreaming way too much it's like everyday when i'm listening to music or looking at pictures i end up doing a reaction in real or talking and smiling to myself i hate it i'm trying to stop but i can't? i'm 16 i want to get on with my life not be someone else in these daydreams i'm famous it's like a story. i have depression but i'm not on any medicine or counciling i had child abuse when iwas younger which caused my depression. I got told people who suffered abuse when they were younger daydream to forget about their past because it's hard to get over. more

Resolved Question: Why did I dream about my long-passed away brother after all these years?

When I was nine, my brother passed away. He was a year and a half younger than me. He had been suffering for some time, after an accident where a nurse gave him the incorrect medication and he wasn't doing so well. I saw his suffering, and in some strange way, I was happy to see him pass because I knew he would be happier. At his funeral I didn't cry, I don't know why. My brother hasn't really been spoken about since. No one brings it up. Ever since he died strange things have happened. I've long since disregarded the odd things...like the fact that his bird died the day after he did, curled up in a sad looking ball. Pictures kept falling off of otherwise sturdy hooks, that sort of thing. I could be reading into it too much, but its one of those things that you have to feel to understand. I'm now a married woman with a child of my own. I haven't thought of him for ages. Last night I had a dream about him. In this dream, he was older though, he looked as though he had actually grown up and was a man, as if nothing had ever happened to him. He said that he never actually died and that hes been alive all along. He said that he is happy to have found me. I remember looking at him and seeing that he had the same green eyes that I do. Our family, in real life, has been torn apart in so many ways, via alcohol abuse from my sister, and physical abuse from my mother...but in this dream his presence felt healing. Like having him there meant that everything was okay and peaceful. In the dream we were simply sitting on a couch in my mother's old house, talking, I remember feeling so much love. I felt excited to have a brother and I just wanted to hug him. I don't know why I had this dream. For the most part, my feelings towards my brother have been distant, the time was so painful in my life that I just shoved it away. Does anyone have any honest interpretations as to why this dream has come now? I feel like I met the man that my brother would have been. Any and all insight is appreciated. more

Resolved Question: I had a dream about my brother that passed away, can anyone interpret it?

Resolved Question: Is my sister in law crazy for doing these things to her daughter....?

Ok so I want to make sure I'm not the only one who thinks my sister in law does crazy things... she dyes my nieces hair, she is 4 years old, the first time she dyed her hair she was probably 2 years old, maybe a little younger, and she puts bleach on her hair right to the scalp, and she still does her hair, she has bleached all her hair blonder (she's naturally blonde) and she has given her foils, as well as even dyed her hair super red like fire engine red... as if that wasn't bad enough she thinks it is super cute and people comment on her pictures on facebook saying how cute it is etc etc, to me it's child abuse! and to top it off, she just put acrylic gel nails on her... she is 4!!! those things are cemented on your nails with that acrylic powder stuff and i have gotten them put on at salons many times and i know how much it hurts to bump your hand the wrong way or whatever.. it hurts like nothing else!! She is crazy right... doing these things to her... she doesn't know that getting her hair dyed will hurt her nor does she know that these nails might hurt her little fingers if she falls down etc... but my sister in law should know... it makes me so mad grrrr more

Resolved Question: What can you do when you know a child is being abused?

If you have joint custody of a child and when you pick them up from their visitation from the fathers home and you find bruises on their backside and legs, do you have the right to keep child from going back to visit until court again? I'd rather be held in contempt of court than to put a 1 year old child back to where he might be abused again. We called CPS and the police, reports and pictures were taken. What can you do to to not be in the line of fire when he comes to pick child up for his visitation time? more

Resolved Question: CHILD ABUSE QUESTION?

I had a friend who is a single mother of an 11 year old daughter. Recently the mother took of to florida to meet a boyfriend for a week in florida. The little girl said something to authorities while she was in school about her being by herself for many days and it alerted the police. The police went to the house and found the little girl by herself. The police called the mother and she said she would be there in a couple days. When the mother got home police immediatly arrested her. The next day there was a huge picture of her in the paper on the front page. This was the mothers first offense. The question i am asking is do you think the mother will go to jail for this, or do you think she will just get community service? I mean she abandoned her little girl for a week, dont you think she should get some jail time? This happened in connecticut. DCF placed the little girl with her father in new york. Do you think he will get full custody now? I hope so cause i really do not like this woman at all! more

Voting Question: should i stay or leave him?

we will be married for a year at the end of this month, but i am miserable. i'm not sure if i'm just making it worse or if i have a legitimate reason for actually getting a divorce. my husband has physically abused me and he got arrested and charged with domestic battery. i found an email to a girl asking to see pictures and to meet up with her. i have a child from a previous relationship and he constantly tells me that i'm a bad mother. we're just constantly fighting and he refuses to go to counseling. the problem is that i'm pregnant, about 8 weeks. i had my son very young and i know that i'm not prepared to take care of two children by myself completely. i'm considering leaving him and having an abortion, but its a very hard decision to make. just getting some honest opinions would help me decide what the best option is for me and my child. thanks for your advice. more

Resolved Question: How can I repair my relationship?

I'm almost I6 and I'm 4 months and 3 weeks pregnant. On valentines day I was feeling awful. I have hyperemesis gravidarium which I had gotten treatment for earlier but for some reason I was vomitting more than ever that day on top of the fact that my hormones are already raging from the pregnancy. My boyfriend, who is the sweetest boy on the planet, gave me my present to cheer me up. He bought me this beautiful handmade locket for $150 with our baby's ultra sound picture from week 16 (she was waving) and a picture of me and him in it. Instead of giving him a big hug and kiss I yelled at him. I told him I didn't want the stupid necklace and that the money could've went to something more useful for the baby. After that everything just went down hill. He yelled back at me. It was the first time he'd ever lost his cool like that. He said he was tired of putting up with my crap and he couldn't deal with the abuse anymore. He said he knew I was pregnant but that being pregnant didn't make women as mean and lazy as I am. Then he went on about how he works 2 jobs and has to manage keeping straight A's so his parents will help us with the baby. I thought he was going to hit me but he just yelled at me until I was in tears then he went to his parents' house. He's the most relaxed person I know. Nothing makes him mad, ever. Its a huge deal I upset him that much. The next day I called my parents over and told them what happened and they took me to see him. I tried talking to him and he said he wanted nothing to do with me. He said the only time he wanted to hear from me or see me was when it had something to do with our child. After a couple of days he came back home but he just acted like I didn't exist. Now he talks to me a little about school and the baby but he doesn't talk to me like he use to. Everything that goes on with him regarding his social life or job or anything like that, I find out from mutual friends and his brother. What should I do to repair the damage I caused to our relationship? Do you think we can even fix this? Do you think we should still even be together? I love him more than anything. I want to be with him but I also want him and the baby to be happy even if that means breaking up. Our little one deserves a happy home. Even if that means she has to spend one week at one house and the next in another. I want her to feel safe and warm and happy, not scared and upset because mommy and daddy are up all night arguing or thinking that love is when 2 people live together in silence. more

Resolved Question: Help!Baby Mama Situation Need Legal Advice?

Ok So this is for my soon to be husband. About a year and a half ago he had a child with his ex. ( there was no fighting more then raising a voice in this releationship) Everything was was great until one day when the child was 2 months old. They had just got done shopping at the mall as a family and as my bf was taking stuff into the house expecting his babies mama to be getting his daughter and being right behind him.. he turned around to seeing her get into the drivers seat and driving off. This was the last time he saw his daughter. He thought she must have forgot something but when she didnt return he called her parents to find out she went there. Might I also add she never worked the whole 3 years they were together. about a month before their kid was born he lost his job due to poor economy. but was looking everyday for a new one and bills were paid. When he talked to her on the phone she said she needed a few days to think and he said he drove to her parents for them to talk and left on a good note. when he got back to his house he found her dad in his house taking his babies crib and her belonging. He then said 2 weeks later he went to her parents house and asked to see his daughter. She wouldnt allow him and called the cops saying he was trying to break in which was a lie. then a few days later he came home to relize she had broke in his house and stole all of the pictures of his daughter and had put a restraining order on him saying he abused he and that she was afraid for her life and a bunch of lies. he missed his daughters first xmas and birthday. she hit him up with child support which he is back on 3000 but the reason for that is because she lived in a very small town and her family is well known there and is family friends with the judge, he has tried to get a lawyer but there is only 3 in the area and none will represent him because they ARE either related or friends with the family. This is why it has been son long. He is so depressed and feels like there is no hope. How can I help him? I NEED to find a way to get his daughter back before it is to late. This is in West Plains MO.. Any legal help would be amazing. and also he is on probation because he tried to call once and she called the cops saying he broke his restraining order but he didnt leave a message or even get ahold of anyone but when he went to court and told the judge that she hit him with 2 years probation. PLEASE HELP!!Dont waste your time to answer if your going to be negative. I know my partner and KNOW he isnt abusive. Her family didn't like him because he was from the city and not a country boy and They lived with his brother and his wife for a year and I they even said that they never fought .. that she was a quiet girl.. She suffered from panic attacks but that was all. She put a restraining order on everyone in his family.. mom dad step mom four brothers.. their wives.. .... he filed for visitation and she filed for sole custody. it hasnt went to trail yet because of the restraining order which is set until see stops breast feeding. when she took the photos of his daughter from his house she left a note saying to forget he ever had a daughter. This was planned and plotted. We think she may have either been cheating or suffered post part um depression. and his child support his paid monthly he just has some back child support because the judge set it rediculasy high. and a lawyer wont traveland it is my biz.. im his best friend and i need to do my best to help him through situations like this.. imagine if you were in his shoes. his probation officer cried when he told her the story of why he was in there. He is not lying or anything like that. This girl is sick and she wanted people to feel sorry for her and attention. I am a mother myself and this woman has prohibited her child from one of the most loving caring fathers there is out there and trust me they are very hard to come by. I pray that no one has to ever see what I have seen this man cry for.. I hope no one is ever hurt like the way he was.. Every Thing I say is truth..cant you awnser based on that? Why are you so quick to judge? more

Voting Question: How come when someone defends a child about being sexually abused, all of a sudden your the bad guy?

My friends daughter was molested at 5 by her fathers friend. After dealing with this jerk getting away with it because his father was a big time lawyer, we ended up starting a sexual abuse benefit (3rd year) for children and now we are seeing who our real friends really are and aren't. Some of our "friends" ( no longer friends ) still communicate with the pedophile who molested my friends daughter or think it's still o.k. to be involved with his friends who have full knowledge that they know he is a child molester. Its like people don't want to see or are too afraid to stand up for whats right and just don't plain give a shit! In turn, we are telling these people to go to hell for supporting a pedophile and now WE are the bad guys??? My friend whose daughter was molested is being harassed and talked bad about on a almost consistent basis since this has started 3 years ago! We are almost at the point to not do this benefit anymore because of all the drama that comes with it. Whats wrong with this picture? Just looking for some positive support :] more

Resolved Question: Why is having big boobs treated like such a bad thing (long and I apologize for ranting)?

I'm probably going to get a lot of abuse over this and regret I even asked, but it really hurts. True, there are the types who walk around showing them off but even if someone with big boobs doesn't go around showing them off (and I wouldn't want to, I'm not like that) you're labeled a sl*t or something equally unflattering. People don't want to know you. All people talk about is how they sag a lot more quickly and use that to make fun of big chested women and who wants to be with a woman whose t**s are sagging and knocking around their knees, etc. Well, exercises can be done to prevent that from happening so quickly and there's always surgery (even though most can't afford it) and besides smaller sized breasts can sag and look not as lovely as they once were too, once the body starts getting older. And sometimes, even though all boobs sag eventually, big boobs that sag can end up not looking that bad, certainly not as bad as people like to create a picture in other's minds of. Not every big breasted woman gets horrible breast/shoulder/neck/back pain. I truly think there are men who don't care what size a woman is, just as there are men who prefer smaller breasts and just as there are men who prefer women with bigger breasts. And for men who prefer bigger breasts, true there are a lot who are just wanting to use that woman, but I also believe that men genuinely respect the women who have bigger breasts too, not because of their chests, but because of the person they are. The focus is not on what size their boobs are. Having big breasts doesn't mean you're dumb or a sl*t or think superficially all the time. I am sorry to rant here, but I am just so sick of being smirked at or treated like there's something wrong with me just because I have a bigger bust. I developed a lot earlier and more quickly than other girls, I don't know why. I've been told that I had a great grandmother with a very large bust, maybe I get mine from her. But it's not something I could help. Why is it that big breasts are such a big deal (no pun intended)? I would agree though that it is hard to find attractive underwear and clothing (except for the women who like to show off everything they've got) I am absolutely not knocking women with smaller breasts, so don't accuse me of that. Why though, do big breasted women get to have smirks and dirty looks, and treated like something is wrong with them? Treated like their breasts need to have something done about them (made smaller) as soon as possible? Yes maybe in future if they had children for example and their breasts had grown to a point where they were just really uncomfortable, they could get them reduced if they wanted to. Same as people get nose jobs, botox, whatever, because a part of their body is bothering them. And while I'm here, some people don't like small breasts. They think they should be made a bit bigger and are unattractive, etc. Small boobs can be beautiful, big boobs can be beautiful. But why are big boobs constantly made fun of? Although I'm aware that smaller-breasted girls sometimes don't get a great attitude from society either, it does seem that people are more eager to jump on the bandwagon of bashing bigger-breasted girls. Why?Is that really all it is? Jealousy? Sometimes I truly feel like there is a real preception in society that having big boobs is wrong, though. It's interesting what you said. Thank you for your answers though.36F. Thank you too for answering :) more

Resolved Question: Child Abuse- If you suspect something what do you do?

In particular, I don't know this child, we have never met. I know her dad as a distant friend and we met thru work. After looking at his pictures on his Facebook page, I noticed that his daughter looks hauntingly sad in all the pictures. I feel like she is screaming on the inside and you can see it. What would you do? Would you send the dad a note on Facebook and say something?I forgot to mention that I don't suspect him of being the abuser. I have no idea who it could be. My biggest concern is that if something is going on and he is just oblivious to it. I just want to make him think, hmmmm maybe I should talk to my daughter........ And yes, maybe it sounds crazy for me to think this based on some pictures, but sometimes you need to follow your instinct! more

Resolved Question: should i stay where i am now, or go back to live w/my mom?seriouse advice only please.idk what to do anymore..?

complicated story.. parents separated for good when i was 6. mom remarried and had another kid. her husband wasnt good to either me or her. verry verbally abusive. their marriage didnt last long at all. now she is with her current husband and has had another child who is now 5. me and my stepdad never got along and that seriously effected my reationship with my mom. we were verry close to eachother and considered each other best friends. in my opinion, she wont open her eyes and realize that she deserves a GOOD man in her life and hasnt found someone thatdeserves her. she isnt happy with him. she settles for much less than what she deserves when it comes to men. he,like her previous husban is verbally abusive and seems like he enjoys breakin me appart emotionally. it didnt take long for me to realize i didnt like him and have wanted one of us out of the picture since. me and my dad havent had a relaionship since i was 5. im now 16. what i remember from my early childhood is him fighting with my mom physically. i would alwayss have to call the police because he would beat her up so bad. there was one ocassion when i tried to call the cops and he came into the room and shoved me againsed the wall by my throught. he is an alcoholic and has a history of drug abuse. after my parents split for good, i didnt see him much. i vistited every once in a while but that was it. my mom obviously doesnt think nicely of him so ive always been told of what a horrible person he is. as i continued to visit him, he seemed like his life was getting better and that he was becoming a better person and father..my mom always told me that sadly thats not the case, its just an act, es a verry minipultive person, and she knows him better than that. i had the chance to move in with my dad and his gilfriend over summer and i took it. my mom obviously didnt want me to go,but my relationship with her had just about dissapeared and my stepdad and i were getting worse. so i moved in with my dad and his girlfriend,rita. after a few months problems started popping up and i noticed how much my mom actualy knew of what she talked about. he hadnt changed much. he still drinks every night, is still minipulative, lovesss to fight and enjoys the drama of it all. rita kicked him out multple times and i always stayed with her during these times. we bacame good friends. she always let him back in the house. he started getting kicked out of the house more often and for longer periods of time. she wouldnt answer her phone when he was out so he began to call my phone and leaving me nasty messages cursing me out and telling me how much he hated me and that he neverr wants to hear from me ever again. basically taking his anger out on me because he couldnt get to her. ive gotten so tired of it and he now not only treats me this way when he is kicked out of the house, but when she lets him back in as well. rita now has power of attorney over me (my mother still has physical custody, my dad has nothing)and i live with her. we have a roomate named george. he is an older guy but he and i have a good friendly relationship. my dad is currently kicked out of the house and is accusing george of innaproprietly touching me. i have NEVER even hugged the guy. hes trying to get me kicked out of the house. he knows DCF doesnt mess around with things like that and i would be sent bak to my mom if there was an accusation made like that. he has actually made the accusation that my uncle was molesting me. this all happened within a week of his daughter(my close cousin) being killed in a boating accident. he knew what he was doing, he likes the control and loves mind games. rita keeps him around to use him. she doesnt love him, its obvious. he is just her little handyman who will be there when ever she wants him to be, and she kicks him out when she gets tired of him. but she is done with him now and he knows that, that is why the accusations of george are comming up. because if he is miserable then he is gonna do his best to put everyone around him through hell as well. nobody wants him around, but as long as im living here, he will have an excuse to be around. as long as i am in ritas life, my dad will be too. me and him have no shot of having a father daughter realtionship. we havent had one since i was 5. i want to stay with rita. i am sooo happy here. i love it. im just now getting used to my new school & we live on a lake so im getting into wakeboarding and i really enjoy it. i have moved 29 times and i just want to finish my remaining highschool years in one place and in this place i feel so incredibly content. i know this all couldve been avoided if i had of stayed with my mom. but even though i saw what he had done when i lived with him and my mom, and wehat he said about my uncle, i wanted so badly to have a normal dad and made myself beleive that he is a better person now. it took me living with him to realize it and now this is the situation i a more

Resolved Question: Is the rise in atheistic beliefs a way to explain why there is a devaluing of life and relationships in the UK?

On BBC Daily Politics show (24 Feb 2010), Steve Harley discussed modern technology but mentioned in passing this point: that there is a decline in family relationships, inter-personal skills and even of the valuing of life itself in the UK today. It seems atheists on this board like to try to blame all life's troubles on religions, but I wonder if they present a fair modern picture of the UK? As there has been a definite rise in people claiming they are atheists or pagans (basically people believing in no personal Deity like the Abrahamic religions claim), it has been matched with a corresponding startling rise in the numbers of abortions, numbers of people in family break ups, drug and alcohol misuse, abuse among children and even on children, on the elderly (just today a report of a 100 year old mother killed by her son), and a general malaise and anger everywhere shown in multiple examples of road rage, ASBOs and increasing numbers of young families having to stay indoors to keep protected from atheist youngsters and the pervading yob culture. Now even assisted suicide is openly discussed as a kind of cure to remove depressed people, or sick elderly people - (showing the kind of ethos which pervaded the secular Mid Staffordshire NHS Trust) What ever happened to cheering people up when they're down? Is the rise in people proclaiming they are atheists and pagans AN explanation (not the only one of-course) as to why these things are happening? Is death the only remedy atheists and other secular belief systems can offer to everybody and everything they find repugnant, like the routine abortions which occur of mentally and physically handicapped babies? Is this a fair explanation for what is currently happening in the UK. Are we all suffering because of intolerant, liberal secularist philosophies?First there is no rose tinted glasses. It is fair to say that things are way out of control nowadays the case in point- child molestation- was a shock in the early 60s, of course it has always happened - but not nearly on the scale as of today. Because it was rare it was hard for people to grasp why it was happening then. The case is shown as to why the churches seem so poorly able to cope with paedophiles- just could not get their heads around the fact some people do these things. And of-course it was very popular in Nazi Germany and other countries non-Christian communities around the world. Churches really have to take the blame though for not seriously implementing St. Paul's instruction that bishops and priests are to be good, true Bible based, self-controlled people. Some responses are simply insulting- and I expect the attempted put-downs so they wash over- this is because Atheists cannot accept responsibility for what they do to societies and families.A point was discussed by about cheering up terminally ill people. Yes we Christians do believe in that - that's why hospices were started. We don't see them as places to become enforced death chambers, but as helping people to their inevitable end with love and compassion (er- words atheist philosophers confuse always with lust and sex) Oh? You didn't know the first hospices were started by Christians- so were hospitals and schools. But then again atheist ideas have watered down education and health care so secular governments now can claim children get higher qualification results as businesses and universities state children are less knowledgeable than they were 30 years ago. One person put me to the test as to cheer up someone who is terminally ill- I ask that person to think before he blurts out his ignorance. I have been in that awful situation - I just didn't think a loving thing to force the to accept suicide. more

Resolved Question: Any guy want to go out with me?

I'm looking for a single guy who is from age 25 to 30. Who is a nice guy. Respectful, funny, fun, has a job, always open to things, not a player. Also a black guy or a mix black guy who is from the united states and is american. oh yeah! I want a big guy lol Before I tell you more about myself. Here is my story.... My last relationship was with a man younger then me. He was nice at first and treated me right. But then he soon started getting mean. He would say i'm stupid, ugly, your fat, and would slap me. in ways he was being verbal abuse to me. I could not even talk to him and say what i wanted. But still he has one thing right... I am stupid! I was so stupid that i was so blind with love that I could not see that he was just using me and treat me like dirt. Even tho there are times he would be nice and try to help me in some ways. But still. I got him alot of things and he still treat me badly. Anyway I'll explain more details later! About me.. I'm nice person! But I am shy. But I do open up! I'm fat but not a really fat person that is over 300 pounds. ..I'm like around 245 or so. ( Trying to lose weight! ) ..And I have booty lol I am 5''7 tall i'm not cute! ...Well to me i'm not. I don't know what you will think. But i'm not cute. I have a child like mind lol. Well most times! But i know how to be serous and act right. I'm smart in most things. But since my trouble pass of when I was in school. I have trouble in hard math and some high level in reading. But Iam smart and clever in most things. I love kids! I hope to have a baby of my own some day. I also love cats and kittens! I'm a big fan of Michael Jackson ( i had a crush on him lol ) i dream to one day get me my own place, get married, and have a family, travel and do lots more. And that picture on the left hand side is not me. My internet on my own computer is out at this time. I'll have it on by friday i hope. But I'm using the schools computer. e-mail me if your the right guy... mjackson5002004@yahoo.comto the 4th person below... wtf?? Did you not read my whole message? What makes you think i'm gay? I'm a women, and only into mens. So no i'm not gay. more

Voting Question: my question concerns child abuse, and child molestation?

First of all i would like to give some insight. I have a younger brother who is in the 4th grade, when he was born he was diagnosed with down syndrome. so here is where the molestation question comes in. I was recenently talking to him and we were looking at his school pictures and he pointed at the principal, and i asked him what about the principal?, he cannot talk so he pointed at his jeans and made a gesture that the principal takes his pants off and tells him to close his eyes. im not 100 percent sure if there is molestation going on, so i wanted to know some ways i can find out if there is molestation happening and what i can personally do? i also want to know some ways i can prove that the principal is actually molesting him so i could press charges? because i dont want any child to have such a principal.Ps my parents know, so does everyone in my family. more

Resolved Question: What is wrong with my cat?

My cat is 2 1/2 years old and she has always had sneezing attacks where big chuncky boogers come out and sometimes they have blood in them. I can see that my cat is in a lot of pain. It's also sometimes watery!!!!!! Also, she has runny eyes and sometimes one eye will be worse than the other. Also, i noticed that around her mouth (like her lips) in the corners its hard, and i dont think thats normal. I live in a small town, and the vet has no idea what it could be. I dont want to spend thousands for them to poke around. Can anyone help??? If i know what is wrong with her, than i can have them test for that. Im pregnant and I cant have my cat sneezing big boogers all over the baby, or on the floor and when my baby is crawling around, have the baby find boogers on the floor ( i just picture a little baby crawling and babies put everything in their mouth, and i can just picture my baby crawling and hand landing in a booger and than the hand in the mouth) I dont want to give my cat away, i know a lot of other people couldnt handle her, and i dont want her to be abused because of her issue. I love her, but i need help and my child is going to come first. more

Resolved Question: Would you be with someone who makes you feel worthless?

okay so my cousins boyfriend is just being really annoying and over protective these days. long story short for a couple of months now all he has been doing is calling her a s*ut, wh*re, b*tch and every other word along those. he freaks out when she talks to other guys and once she had a picture of a male celeb up on facebook and he blew up and made a HUGE scene about it. he even says sh*t about her brother, sister and my sister yet she doesn't even care. He says that my family is just a bunch of wh*res and that we cheat on everyone and stuff like that which is untrue. he has her trapped. we tell her so many times that he's not good for her but she doesn't care. they break up then the next day he says something and she takes him back (this has happened about three times already) she doesn't want to break up with him because she thinks he can't live without her and that everyone in my family already knows him. which are stupid reasons. my whole family is extra protective over her because this already happened to my other cousin too she loved a guy, everyone knew he was bad, they tried convincing her not to get married, they got married anyways, had children, he physically abused her and now... he left her and his three children. that man sicknesses me. and my cousins bf is gonna be just like that. he even said "when we get married I'm never coming to any family gatherings) guess who else said the same? so basically, how to we get her to understand that he's not right for her? after everything that's happened + more but it will take to long to write many people don't like him at all anymore including me. and yeah shes only 20 and she thinks she can't find anyone else. they've been together for over a year now...sorry it's so long "/ more

Resolved Question: Should I send this to the OTHER WOMAN!! Bitch just took my husband and I am left with a one year old.?

I am writing this to you as I feel that you need to have a full picture of what happened over the months of Nov 09-Feb 2010. I am fully aware that the affair began before he left the home but I was unaware until I spoke to people who confirmed it for me. Daniel had very carefully made sure I have no contact with you and fed you whatever crazy nonsense about me because he is so terribly afraid I will inform you of what really happened. I am certainly angry that you are the type of person to start an affair with a married man who has an infant child. You will never even understand the enormity of how wrong your actions were until you have a child yourself and that will haunt you when it happens. You are just another victim of Daniels behaviour and if anything, in the long run, I will be thankful that you ended what was a very dysfunctional relationship. When I married Daniel I was very aware of his faults but I still loved him. My friends and family tried to gently warn me but like you are now, I was blinded by love. But it was the continual affairs (you are the third I am aware of) , compulsive lying, long term drug abuse, inability to maintain strong friendships and mistrust in people that Daniel has that slowly ruined the relationship. He knew he had to get out because he would never have been good enough to be a fit father and husband. He couldn’t handle the commitment and pressure. He will tell you his story of how bad his childhood was and how he was so emotionally abused, but that just gives him an excuse to feel it is ok to behave the way he does. During the time he was living with you he told me he was living with you and your husband (which I now know you ex-husband never lived in that house) and that you were just good friends. He has told me many things about you that you told to him confidentially in supervision. He was still having a sexual relationship with me right up to the Wednesday night after I found your Valentines gifts in the car. He has sex with me standing up in the shower, which must be something that you two do and he NEVER had sex standing up with me before, he said he couldn’t do it. He probably wanted to compare the two. Is the “wand” a new trick from you too? He told my family members, the counsellor and friends that he was having time out while we rebuilt the foundations of our marriage for a reconciliation. He sent me several texts, emails and phone calls EVERY DAY, confirming his love for me and George. He kept telling me that he was still my husband and at no point was a divorce ever discussed. Every time he saw me he had his wedding ring on. He wanted to maintain a part time marriage and have his lover too. I am unsure how long he wanted to continue it but in the month of March, we had a weekend away booked for Yallingup and three concerts. He would have told you he was with his parents but he would have been with me. The last two weeks before I found all of your gifts in the car, he was living at my brother in laws, as he had told me he wanted to be closer and spend more time with each other as he was considering moving back. You obviously had an argument on the Wednesday before Valentines day as he was spending the day with me! The only reason why he is now living with you is because he HAS NO WHERE ELSE TO GO!! No friends, no family, no one wanted to know him after the truth came out and the extent of his disgusting way of treating his wife and son. You will soon realise that he lies to you all the time, little things, big things. He is very good at doing it. I always knew he lied but I just accepted it was a part of him. He will look you right in the eye and swear on his life, he always says that and he will also tell you, “Go on, ring them yourself and ask” because he knows you never will. You will start to mistrust your gut feelings and then think that maybe it is you who is just so negative and untrusting. You can take what ever you want from this email, I just wanted to give you my side of the story. He is very charming when he wants something but he will get bored of you and then you will see who he really is. You will remember what I have written today, it may take you a year or like me a very long time, 12 years, but you will see who he really is. Unfortunately I should have listened to the advise given after the second affair, leopards never do change their spot. If you don’t head my warnings, I will enjoy watching over the years because unfortunately I still have to have him in my life because of our son. Also I advise you have an STD test as I will be. Even though he was having sex with us at the same time, I am sure that there have been others. more

Resolved Question: what would you do if you found out the "child" you are guardian of may be prostituting?

I began sleeping at my mother's home with my 11 year old son the night that my mom died. My 17 year old sister and 19 year old brother needed guardianship and noone in the family was willing to step in. Children's services came a couple weeks later and tried to take my sister to foster care. They said my belongings were not in the home and my sister needed supervision. She begged me to stay, to completely move in, to sign the guardianship papers. She said she would stop stealing and smoking weed and drinking if I would just let her stay at home. So reluctently I did with terms that my lil sister- who had been physically abusing our mother- (she died after a difficult and painful 8 yr battle with cancer) agreed to go to counseling, stay in high school and do her best to do right. 3 months later she dropped out of school. I keep supporting everything (we own the home and I pay all the bills, food, etc) for over a year. My brother moves out to continue with college. My sister become violently angry and the cops are called out on a few occasions. She spends her days locked in the back studio smoking weed and drinking with many many mexican gang members. I talk to her. I pull the doors off the studio and empty it all out. I call the cops. she promises she will do better. i recently came home to busted out windows and cops again. She gets into it with my fiance and begins making lies about him. She threatens to tell children's services lies to have my son taken away from me. I found a letter in her own writing stating that she was going out to "make a hit" and her prostituting activities. A neighbor's cousin said she solicited him. I found pictures on her computer and business cards from a local strip club. She comes home with bags of juicy couture, guess, etc etc...but she does not have a job. And now she has a car. As a family we want to kick her out....If she wants that life. She says she's not doing anything of the sort and that I am angry that she is finally doing good. (?!?!) So is she prostituting? Or should I stand by her side because she's going through a "tough spell" and lost her mom so young? She hates me, she's attacked me in the past and i feel like my relationship and needs of my child are being hurt. aye, aye. what would you do? more

Resolved Question: i think i may have been molested as a child and cannot remember?

i was just wondering if others could give me some feedback or opinions on what i am going to describe... i remember when i was little my mother telling me that no one was aloud to see or touch my privates except her or my grandmother (like if i had a rash or something) and to never let anyone else--and if they told me my mom said it was ok i still wasnt aloud to let them..which brings me to my first thought...was my mother molested by a family member when she was a child and this is why she is telling me this? or was it just for my protection--like "if you walk away from me at the store, a man will take you and you'll never see mummy again"..which she also said to me to scare me.. one of the other things i remember-- i had to be atleast 3-5 years old--and i had this big doll house and i could close myself in it--i remember taking my ken doll from barbies--i pulled down my pants in the enclosed doll house and put his hand on my privates..did i do this bc my mother told me not to let anyone touch my privates or was i doing it bc someone was touching me innapropriately?? and also i dont remember if that occured before or after she said this to me.. and why did i take a ken doll and do it and not a barbie or a girl doll? i dont remember if i said anything while i was doing that or anything else really bc it was so long ago--the other thing that i feel was a little strange--is that my mothers uncle lived with us on and off alot and hes an alcoholic. i remember we used to play "house" i called him "husband" and he called me "wife" i can remember always sitting on his lap facing him and hed run his hands up and down my sides (like under my armpits down my sides) and i remember something about a white tank top i was wearing for some reason but cant figure out why this shirt is sticking out as significant. i would hate to accuse my uncle of something bad especially if he did not do anything wrong--in retrospect i can still see the creepy weird way he looked at me when hed be rubbing me--every now and again when i may see him and he is drunk--he gets that same creepy look in his eyes. but--i wondered had he molested my mom--would she have let my sister stay with my grandma while he was also spending the night?? it is a small efficiency--could she have thought nothing would happen because my grandma would obviously know-and my sister is 10 so she knows hed be doing something bad to her.. i mean if my mom had this happen to her--would she have allowed me to be around him as a child?? i have heard stories and things that children who touch their genitals with dolls or stuffed animals could be sexually abused--that is not normal--and as a child you think your pee pee is just to go potty--u dont know about sex yet-- and also when i was about ten i remember playing cops n robbers with a lil girl down the street and i loved when shed handcuff me and throw me down on the bed for some reason (as weird as that sounds)--my mother told me the basics of birds n bees when i was around 8-10-- even though i have dramatically changed my life and surrendered to God--in the past i have been very permiscuous, losing my virginity at age 12. i was physically and emotionally abused as a child--my entire childhood was extremely disfunctional--my bio. father was not in the picture and my mother skipped town when i was 12 where i bounced from relative to relative. i am just wondering if there is sexual abuse that i have repressed or simply cannot remember bc of my age--but i feel like i may have been due to the certain things i do indeed remember.. id like to know--however knowing would not change my feelings of myself and my worth now--its just bothering me why ive felt that i was molested for the past couple years now.. what do you think based on this info? thank u for ur time guys! more

Voting Question: Will my income be taken into consideration when he goes to court for an increase?

So we are married and we make a decent living, i have a child he has two. The mother has a total of four children, two from my husband and two from another relationship. Both father support their children she works full time and well as my previous questions, she lives well above her means and the children to live in the best of situation. We have pictures of how the kids live but since they are not being beaten and abused not much can be done to her other than a slap on the wrist. What can my husband to to prevent all our our hard money going to her cause the kids sure don't get much use of that child support. They are with us every weekend and we support them here. more

Resolved Question: do i have a lawsuit against child protective?

I am someone who slipped through the cracks of CPS i guess you could say. I was the victim of abuse by my step-father for 11 years. CPS was first called to look into our case when i was 6 years old. I had been sent to school covered heard to toe in bruises. When questioned i held nothing back and told about the abuse. My step-father was arrested but then let go within a short time and nothing resulted. I was then pulled out of school by my parents. After recieving countless complaints from concerned neighbors who could hear the screaming CPS was forced to open an investigation because i ran away from home. Again i told them everything that was happening. My step-father gave a different story and they took his side. They closed the case because they couldnt see any bruises. One year later i ran away from home again and same scenario, only this time CPS even cut the investigation short saying there was no form of abuse taking place, only a troubled teen. One year later i ran away again. The police came to pick me up and were told to just return me home because i had a history of running away. This time i clung to the police officer and cried and told HIM everything and he refused to bring me home. Said he would bring me home with him before he'd ever let me go back to that house. When the police opened their investigation they found plenty of evidence...enough to put the man away for 24 -28years....and that sentance was only based on 5 of the 11 years. Something is very wrong with this picture. Someone wasnt doing their job. I worry every day that this same thing may be happening to another child, only this child may not make it to the police. I almost didnt. What can i do? more

Resolved Question: How to heal this rift? Or avoid it/take action?

A long, long, loooooong set of years ago, I looked up pictures of nudity for about a year or so when I was 10, and when my parents found out they beat me til I bled and had two fist-sized bruises, black and green, and puked on the floor. So, tho this seems like an eternity ago, my parents still hold it against me and heaven forbid my siblings blackmail me. Father makes fun of me and uses it to trump me in any debate/argument, and just recently I was innocently trying to mull over a sexual topic with my mother and she turned on me. They both say they have no trust in me, and when my dad gets mad he says that I'll be nothing more than a stripper when he kicks me out of the house. He has yelled in my face, telling me to get out of his house before. Anyways, how do I get over this? Who am I supposed to call; police, suicide hotline, child abuse, 911? If I do, they'll likely take away my younger siblings because they aren't being homeschooled though they have papers saying they are. I want to get away from my dysfunctional family. I thought I really didn't want to because they drive me to my horseback riding lessons (the only joy I have, only thing suicide proffessionals could come up with to deter me from suicide- I emailed a suicide-prevention group a few times before-) but I realize I have other relatives to drive me there. Though... I dunno if my dad's going to keep paying for it if he knows I called children's aid/police on him. If I don't get the interaction with horses, I'm afraid I'll commit suicide (no friends or anything, I have mental problems my parents caused that makes me really confused and awkward with people. I naturally have a deep bond with animals and am aloof with people, but the mental probs I have make me feel like total crap before, during, and for weeks after a social interaction- it's real bad) I feel I have to do something; my parents have given up on everything, refuse to get me help for my mentality, and my younger siblings are getting no education for years.I only looked at the nudity because I was going through big puberty at that time in my life, and my puberty was far stronger and more intense than others, and I felt fat and ugly so I looked because I wanted to compare myself to something. more

Resolved Question: Teens ,mothers is this normal ? why is she doing this ?she is only 16?

My daughter is only 16 and is not like a normal teen she is cutting her wrists constantly ,every time i see her there is more cuts STORY she was ill period pains and i asked her to take a pain killer so she took 5 in one time ,then later on in the evening she took another 10 ,that's 15 ,your only aloud 8 in 24 hours,when i asked her she said i never knew ?Then 2 days later i was sorting her room out i found a knife in her pillow case with a pack of condoms and a bag with paracetamols in.when i asked her she said i was ill didn't feel well . There has been other problems in the past like rape ,and abuse in her life but should i really be taking on my husbands daughter while i have other children ,and she is this bad ? when asked about her wrist she says its my body get over it ,and her stomach is completely wrecked ,she car vs her name and everything . please help her picture is on the side more

Resolved Question: What is wrong with her ?

Resolved Question: What else can I do? I have no idea how i could make this work!?

So i just turned 15 a few weeks ago, I live in the UK, I've been riding horses for 8 years and working on foot with horses for about 7 1/2 of those years. I so desperately want a horse but my mum seems to think that i'm going to need to marry a millionaire to be able to do it, even though i've added up the prices and it comes to about £1500 per year and that's with extra put back for unexpected costs. Heck, I cost my mum about 8-£10,000 per year! That's admittedly on food, clothes and riding lessons/clothes (hat, boots, jodhpurs, etc). I wouldn't mind sacrificing getting new clothes, unless it was a total necessity of course, for a horse. My mum also seems to think that horses need a vet out everyday and that it's everyday that a horse will break it's leg and have to be put down, admittedly it could happen and horses do always seem to find a way to hurt their selves to some extent but it's not like a horse will definitely break something if i got one and I'd have insurance covered for that, and even then, I wouldn't keep a horse alive if the vet said it wouldn't be able to have the quality of life that it should! I can't get a job because it's "child-labour" I wouldn't be able to work off livery fees because the place that i would want to board at just say that they won't do that because it would be "child-labour". Finding a job where i live is nearly impossible, I live in a town where teenagers aren't trusted in shops whether it be behind the till or stacking shelves. I have no idea what i could do to make money, there's no snow, no lawns to mow (i don't think i could be trusted with a lawn mower anyway!) and other jobs like dog walking and baby-sitting wouldn't fit in with everything else (unfortunately, children aged 5+ tend to annoy me.) There's no paper rounds left anywhere either. I'm desperate to get a horse but with no way of getting an income and my mum unwilling to consider (usually) it just seems so far away for me. Due to massive family conflicts my dad isn't in the picture anymore and I'm glad, and because of these conflicts being around horses is a way for me to escape and feel like a normal 15 year old girl. (Long story short, my dad sexually abused me twice when i was 13, he's in prison until September 2010 and my grandparents on his side are taking unconditional love for him to extremes.) I really want to be around horses more often and to be able to finally call an animal my own and to be able to care for it but my mum is unwilling to take me to the yard and pay £5 each time even though it doesn't include riding I love just being around horses. She said she would be willing to take me everyday after school if i had my own horse but since i don't there "isn't any point" apparently *rolls eyes* my mum isn't exactly like me, she likes walking around malls and spending all her money on clothes for me and her, getting her hair cut, etc but I like putting muck into wheelbarrows and sitting on a horses back and trailing through muddy fields. The other day she asked me how much working livery was at my riding stables (horse gets a stable, pasture, hay, straw, feed but has to be used in so many hours a week) i told her i wasn't sure and would ask. I haven't talked about it since because if i talk about it she will say straight up "no." I have no idea what i can do to find a way around it, she's coming to watch me ride on my favourite pony that i want to share with the stables (they have a part-loan scheme) on friday for an hour lesson because she hasn't seen me for the past 7 years and i begged her to come and watch me in the morning. Other than that I have no idea what to do to get her into thinking about it a bit more and not getting my hopes up like my dad used to with the whole "in a year i'll get you a horse" "you will get a horse" "I can afford one" "now i can't" etc etc etc. My mum isn't horsey, in fact she's scared of them, but i would quite like to convert her and make her see what appeals to me about them. So how can i make money? How can I show her that i could handle one? How can I convince her? P.S Even if i just part loaned my favourite pony, Minstrel, for a few months that would be good enough, i just want to get more experience rather than once a fortnight lessons (I go up every week end but ride every other, unless i'm asked to help as a hack escort.) P.S.S I'm totally grateful for what i have, if it wasn't for my mum i wouldn't have had the opportunity to have got on a horse and ride properly but now it has come to the time that i need to learn more and the only way of doing that is to move on to sharing, full loaning or owning. more

Resolved Question: Paramedic/Emergency Medical Technitian side effects?

I have just started taking a class for Emergency Medical Technitians (ambulence person) and we had our first class today. We didn't see any gruesom pictures, but our instructor told us some stories of his time in service- Child abuse situations, suicidals, criminal hazards, watching people you can't save die before your eyes... I've felt sick to my stomach all day and have been picturing my friends dying virtually nonstop ever sinse class was let out. I'll be taking this class twice a week until June, I don't want to feel like I'm gonna hurl for 6 months! What do I do? Is this normal? Does it just go away over time? Are there any Paramedics, EMTs or First Aid peoples who have gone through this and know how to stop mentally frieking out? more

Resolved Question: Domestic Violance charge and assualt, Want to see if people thought a Jury Trial would be best?

know before i began I'll tell you up front this is a big mess and I have know doubt you will be shocked as I am. Im dating at female that 24 years ago I dated in highschool I remeet her 2 years ago and things in her life was pretty much a wreck, 2 daughters 3 and 12 at that time, she was a bad drinker case a day and weighin only at 105, living with mom and she was just as bad. She told me alot about her past sense she didnt want me to find out the hard way, 8 years drug and prostution alot of abuse along the way, so even with the high rish she told me she was ready to be good person, I dated her a year apart living 700 miles away i made it to see her weekly my job helped that. during that year about 5 months in she came up for a months and visit, started drinking heavy again, she was down to 4-5 beers but when she was visting got drunk one night tore up cellphone windows and even broke a lamp over my head said she was leaving and i said u levae with girls drunk ill call the law, well she tried and i follow through and they showed up, she was arrested assault, disorder conduct, criminal damages, they said that nite sense children was in the house be had to blow, i did she refuse, i guess if you blow to much kids cannot stay. well she got off with 2years non reporting probation, I sent her back home and was going to end it but didnt, still had hope for her, very important I left out, She is extremmly Bi Polar with in and out mental hopsitals, we moved along very well and she try really hard in 1-09 she went into mania and up and left kids with her mom and spent the weekend till monday morning with a crack dealer , i spent the whole weekend fax and emailing her picture every where. Dont say sucker yet im not done 2 months later she convince me again that all was ok and she moved in with me, things was so great we have been so happy her drinking was a pain in the but she would get stupid real easy, well couple of weeks ago i seen the spending part of her mania coming, wasnt sure but little for me to know, she started talking about drugs and I told her i wouldnt be a enabler, already let the booze slide, she kept on even called a freind she use to smoke with down where she lived, by thrusday she was complaining for me to goto work, was funny because i normall cannot leave her side. well friday was her and we planned all week to got the movies with 5yo and watch a show, add this the other daughter lives with dad efore moving up here. We didnt go and she started drinking bad and I drank light because i knew it was going to be bad night. because a week before this her dad normally doesnt drink but him and her got on the phone and got so drunk she fell over the dinner table and i mean turn it on the side, pulled a draw out for dresser and pull it so far out it fell to the grown cutting her leg. Well back to friday night it was around 8:40 pm she had been trying to call her mom and she woldnt answer and said she would wait till tommow, well 3 drinks later back on the phone called about 20 numbers and never no answer, by 10 she was good and drunk she said she was calling the guy she use to smoke crack with to see what he was into, i said no and jerk the phone out of her hand, she said can i try mom again i said sure, well mom answer and she said i hurt her arm and to call the police her mom asked to talk to me and she asked me if she was drunk and i say yes really bad, she told me to tell her to goto bed, she went into the bedroom for a moment and then come out to back door and say bye, i thought oh well i have the car keys she not going far, well i kept talking to her mom and 20 minutes later cops show up, they had her outside and me inside, so they asked me and told them what i wrote here, he said she said you chocked i said no way and he said she said you tryed to break her arm i said no, he went back out, said where did she get the long bruise all the way down her side, i explain that from where she fell over the table and the long cut is from the dresser he said thats what she said but she said i punched in the mouth and i said she got that when she went over dining room table look at its old. well i thought i would stay one nite and wehen he said someone has to go i said guess take me she has her daughter her, so i got in the car and it dawn on me, i just repay a loan she made me and she got paid she got 1600.00 i freaked out i knew i been set up, yes i cryed and begged police to go back and check on her i was so worry about the 5 yo, he said he would , well sitting in the poky i put all off it togther and after that i lost my mind to the fears, they brought in a concouler for me the next day around 5pm I told the women everything and i told her this was a setup and someone need to check on the kid, well she got me calmed down and i went to gernal population and i never been in jail. well i called my cell and she answer only phone that it would call collect still dont know how it was done maybe because businessmy other concern, should they have gave her a breathizer test that night before leaving the 5 yo in her care, they told me on the first time when she went to jail i had to so if it wasnt to high they wouldnt have to call children to come for her. more

Resolved Question: How do I find my biological father?

My biological father was in my life for a few months after I was born, I don't know the specific time frame. All I know is his first and last name, which is actually quite common: Kenneth Hutchins. He should be in his very early forties by now. My birth certificate stated my father was "unknown", but I had been told all my life that this man is my biological father. I don't have personal information, just a picture in my head that I had at my old house of my mother with him. So I know what he looked like back right before I was born. I am about to be 20 years old in four month, I am not a desperate 15 year old who doesn't love their parents. For personal reason, my parents (mother and step-dad) disowned me, which is fine. I was physically and verbally abused all my life as an only child, and never really got the childhood I should've had. But I still came out fine. Now...I'm feeling a little down, because I've realized that NEITHER of my biological parents love me. One of them hates me with a passion, the other doesn't even know me at all. Please help me find out how to find my biological father. I just want to meet him, and whether the experience be good or bad, I'm dying to find him. PS: I know that sometime around June of 2009, he was residing in Bandon, Oregon, and he was working in construction. That's all I know. more

Resolved Question: What do I need to obtain custody of my younger brother?

I am not going to go into details about the situation I am in. However, I can undoubtedly prove that the parent with custody is unfit to be his guardian. I currently watch him from 7-4 Monday through Friday and can show everything that I provide him. I can get character references. I can get letters from multiple witnesses naming me the most responsible to care for him. However, I need to know what all I will need to be able to provide if I am going to actually stand a chance. He currently resides with our mom. His father is some-what in the picture. He previously had a restraining order put on him for domestic abuse and child endangerment however it has now ran out. He is bipolar but does take medication to try and regulate his mood swings. Both parent will fight me for custody although I am fairly confident that I can prove to be a better provider. Also, I am looking into free consultations at the moment, but in the mean time I would like to try and gather as much information so I can begin preparing now for this process.I am currently looking into that. I was just hoping for a little preperation. I am sure they can provide it I guess. Thank you. more

Resolved Question: Would You Put Pictures Of Your 2 Year Old Dressed Like A Tart On The Internet?

If not why not. I cannot believe people think that is not some form of child abuse. more

Resolved Question: How do you go about protecting a child from their parents in a case like this? Or do you?

Say you have custody of children who can’t be with their parents due to substance abuse. The mother walked out on them five years ago. The mother has now been clean for about 5 months and is having visits. She has graduated to overnights/weekends. She still has a lot of problems I’ve observed that the children don’t really know about. (I don’t badmouth her.) Her anger, her refusal to get employment, and other things. I THINK she drinks, nothing abusive, but coming from an alcoholic home I do know that substitution is typically a time bomb. In the last five years, the children adjusted to living without their mother. Now they’re visiting again. One of the children is so in love with her mother’s love, I’m worried about her perception of reality and if there is something I can/should do in case the mother leaves again. For example... she is writing an essay at school about the person she admires and respects the most. She has chosen her mother. Her essay is really.... distorted. I haven’t said anything. There’s no way to address it without painting a poor picture of her mother. She calls her mother around 5 times a day. I don’t want to be the person to tell her you can’t call your mother. I haven’t done that yet. I’m not sure if it’s the right or wrong thing to do. I’m worried that this isn’t very good for her though. The child has problems as a direct result of the abandonment from her parents. Nightmares, anxiety attacks, unusual fears, and other things. I’m not sure she could handle it if her mother relapses. What would you change or limit? Is it inappropriate to limit phone calls to her mother? I need to protect her. Her counseling doesn’t start for another couple weeks.I absolutely give her credit, and I'm sorry if that wasn't clear. She has been working hard at staying clean. My only priority is the children though. more

Resolved Question: Question for foster children who were adopted at a young age?

Obviously every situation is different, but I was wondering about when/how you learned of your past? My girls came to us as foster children at ages 3 months and 9 months. They are half sisters. They were taken away because of neglect, drug and alcohol abuse and some physical abuse. They know they were adopted, but are only 4 and (almost) 3... they don't quite understand it yet, but we have every intention of being honest with them. They were too young to remember the details of it, so we have to give it to them in 'doses' when they can understand it. So far, my 4 year old has asked to see pictures of her in my belly (we have a biological son so she sees pregnancy pictures) and I told her that she grew in another womans belly and when she was a baby, she came to live with us. She giggled and walked away. (kids lol). Anyway- how old were you when you saw your social services records (if at all)? When did you learn about the reasons you were taken away? Was there anything that really helped you deal with it? I was taken from my biological mother at age 4 and went to live with my dad whom I had never met. I didn't remember a lot of the details but would have nightmares about the abuse. When I was 19 I got copies of the DHHS reports. My parents did tell me some info, but I know they were afraid to hurt my confidence (which was hurt anyway since I knew my mother couldn't take care of me and let all that happen.) Sorry this was so long. I know every child is different, I am just looking for some advice!!! Thanks!!I do have the DHHS records for the girls (only the things that involved them, not all the records of the parents wrong doings/drug offenses, etc)- but will definitely not let them look at them until the are much older. I wasn't sure what to do when (as mentioned) a pre-teen or teenager wants to see them. I am SO concerned about the fine line of being honest and telling too much. Both of your replies have helped a LOT though!!!! Thank you!!! more